We have considered doing a charcuterie board as a centerpiece at each table surrounded by a little bit of greenery, maybe some candles. We will have a pretty extensive cocktail hour and a half so I’m curious to hear your thoughts on this idea. Would you (as a wedding guest) enjoy having additional appetizers on your table when you’re seated?
Since charcuterie could potentially be as expensive as flowers, we could easily reallocate that money to our florist budget. We thought the cutting boards used for the charcuterie could be taken home by someone at the table — similar to giving away flower centerpieces at the end of the night. General thoughts?
Disclaimer: if we go with this idea, the venue staff would wash the cutting boards before the end of the reception. Guests wouldn’t be taking home dirty dishes lol

First of all Weddit thanks for all the input and help and ideas. It was great to have a place of sanity to go while we were planning this day for the last 2.5 years! Our wedding was incredible and while it wasn't the day we had originally wanted, it was perfect. I am so grateful that we were able to have our closest friends and closest family there. As we navigated our options with postponing we realized that it wasn't really an option for us. Due to my husband's job if we didn't have our celebration in October, it wasn't going to happen until at least fall 2022. We'd already been engaged for 2 years and we were both ready to move on. While postponing is the right option for some couples, we realized that there are a million reasons to celebrate so we wanted to do something this year and we can throw a huge party with everyone we love for an anniversary, birthday, big life celebration, or just because we want to.
I know that having a wedding at all right now is a controversial topic. I really don't want to have the conversation with anyone about the precautions we took. Among other things, every single person that attended had to have a negative test within 24 hrs. We did not invite friends/family that would have to travel and the one bridesmaid (bff) that did travel came in with us 3 weeks early so that we could all quarantine and test multiple times. We also had ample mask wearing, sanitizer, distancing of all seating, and everything was outside. Post wedding everyone tested again and everyone was negative. I do not want to engage with anyone on if it was the right thing to do.
THE BASICS
Date: October 10, 2020
Guests: originally planning for 225, ended up with about 50 once we cut the list down. There were a lot of family and friends that weren't invited to our smaller celebration.
Venue: The Historic Thayer Hotel at West Point
Pictures: https://imgur.com/a/DpcLVeX
What went not so right:

• I super sprained my ankle on the way to the venue on Friday. We were picking up lunch in the town next to the hotel and I stepped of a curb wrong. I ended up with 2 grade 3 (the worst!) ankle sprains on the inside and outside of my ankle, with significant bone bruising. This was determined at my MRI the Tuesday after the wedding. Thanks to the hotel for having a wheelchair for the rehearsal, my physical therapist for being the best and facetiming me literally hours before the rehearsal, my aunt for getting multiple boots for me on her way up, and the most amazing friends I was able to walk down the aisle and overall have an amazing night.
• The flowers. They were all kinds of wrong. No one else would know that but me, but instead of a bouquet with lots of flowers the greenery to flower ratio was completely wrong. The colors were wrong (way more white than burgundy) and overall the flowers were just not what I wanted. When we went for the final she didn't have a mock up done and if I were to do this again I would insist there was a mockup so that I'd know I was getting what I wanted. There were also no cake flowers provided. I would not recommend this florist (PM me if you need details)
• the cake. While it tasted fine and none of our guests knew it was also all kinds of wrong. 4 days before the wedding the owner of the bakery called me and tried to completely change our cake. We were meant to have a full buttercream cake with the bottom tier burgundy ombre and flowers on the cake. This was what we got instead There was fondant and it looked like an episode of "nailed it". Our Maitre'd also said that the overall quality of the cake was terrible (this was their preferred vendor and apparently quality has been declining) and I honestly felt like we were scammed between the tasting and presentation and what we ended up with. I would never recommend anyone get a cake from Sweet Grace bakery in NJ.
• Some key family members weren't able to be there. My husband's aunt and uncle, who was supposed to be our second officiant, couldn't be there due to a medical issue (unrelated to COVID) and he was very much missed. A dear friend was also unable to come be a bridesmaid in the wedding due to the pandemic. She moved abroad and was going to come back to the states, see family and quarantine, but given current restrictions, she was nervous about being able to get back to her home so she wasn't able to be there.

What went right:

• literally everything else.
• I walked down the aisle to "Storybook Love" from the princess bride. The ceremony made me cry. My husband's vows were the most romantic and I felt like our ceremony was a perfect blend of us. We are an interfaith couple and we wrote our ceremony with the help of our officiant, my aunt. We used both a reading from the bible and followed many cultural jewish traditions. More than one person told me that they loved how we did a modern secular reading of the seven blessings and we had descriptions of all of the rituals and traditions in our program. If anyone wants a link to the rituals and traditions in a jew-ish wedding i'm happy to pass along.
• Streaming was amazing. We hired someone my mom found (PM for info, he was seriously great) to set up streaming for our ceremony. The stream was high quality, our website worked well, putting the program online and making a virtual guestbook were great touches. It was streamed through youtube live and it was so nice that it auto records so that we could see it right away! I'd recommend kudoboard for anyone that is doing a virtual ceremony. We loved reading all of the notes and I had the board printed to put with our untraditional guestbook
• the food! Omg the food. We had a cocktail hour with individually plated apps, a 5 course dinner, dessert, and a farewell station. Our venue also wrapped up all of the food my husband and I couldn't eat and it was just delicious. Food, photo, and overall vibe were the top things for us and we definitely achieved it.
• photo and video-- i'm obsessed with our photographer, PM me for the details because I didn't ask about posting. Our videographer was also amazing and he actually stuck around for like 20 min after his scheduled end time so he could see us attempt to cut the cake with a sword. I would highly recommend both
• My veil and makeup! My veil was made by the incredible Morgan from Cicada bridal in Seattle and Makeup was perfect. Our makeup artist (PM for details) did a great job of keeping us on a schedule and overall made the morning vibe perfect. She stood up for me when I needed it the day of the wedding as well. Those two things really made me feel like my look came together and my bridesmaids all loved their looks.
• Mismatched bridesmaid dressed. Honestly I'm just obsessed with the burgundy to blush look and i'd do this again in a heartbeat. I am so glad that everyone picked their own dresses. I gave all bridesmaids $100 to get a dress.
• the band! everyone had a great time and they did a really good job reading the room on when it was time to eat vs when some people wanted to dance. They never called everyone to the dance floor and we had an amazing night. Even my aunt who had been beyond a hermit for the last 8 months felt safe during some of the slow songs to dance with my uncle, away from everyone.

BUDGET BREAKDOWN
I am doing my best to break down the budget as detailed as possible. We got married in a HCOL area and our original budget reflects the plan for a more traditional Jewish wedding, where parents were allowed to invite friends. It was important to us that everyone was there with us, our whole proverbial community and we knew there would be a premium paid for that. Once we downsized and added streaming I know there were ways to do it for less, but the quality of the virtual experience was important to us. I don't regret for one second what we spent on things, and we could've easily spent more.
I am putting this budget breakdown in because the two in my budget range that I saw when I was planning made me feel more sane. I really do not appreciate the budget shaming that often happens on this sub. It was hard planning in such a HCOL area where the national averages are not representative, so I do hope this can help anyone who is looking for what things really cost for a wedding of this size in and around NYC
One thing to note is that we got engaged in June 2018 and while we spent a lot of money, a lot of it was spread out over nearly 2.5 years. Day to day, the amount spent on the wedding didn't impact our budget and we did not go into any debt.
My parents contributed a set amount to the wedding and my fiancé's parents covered the rehearsal dinner. I am not including my engagement ring or the honeymoon in this because I have a rough idea of how much my husband spent on my ring, but I've never asked for sure and our honeymoon is not going to happen until the world opens up. We are planning on taking 2 big trips to double celebrate our honeymoon (and because since we're waiting, why not?) to Japan and then to South Africa and Namibia.
totals:
all totals include gratuities
initial budget: 80k
planned budget pre-covid: 100k
Total spent (including things that were not really in the budget) ~50k
Breakdown:
****Ceremony and Reception: ****

• Venue and Catering: $14,005.18 This included the fee for the ceremony ($1500), AV setup (hardwired internet), breakfast/lunch the day of, all wedding food, open bar, matire'd fee, gratuities/taxes, all linens, china, table setup, staff, cake, etc. this also includes the cost for the bride and groom's hotel room for 1 night as it was comped the other night.
• Officiants: $600, we had my aunt officiate and did the legal bits in a count house months earlier so she did this for free but we paid for her hotel room (2 nights) as a thank you so
• Ceremony Streaming: $750. This was a last minute cost and while we both think it was a bit high, the streaming was perfect and paying to not have that stress was incredible. I'd highly recommend the guy who did our streaming as he set everything up well and we got so many compliments on the stream.
• Ceremony/Cocktail Hour Music: $700 this included a flute/violin duet for a prelude and ceremony and then a jazz trio for cocktail hour. They were great.
• Flowers: $3,906.76 . We are in discussions with the florist that we did not get the things we asked for and are looking for a refund in some part of this. Our original estimate pre covid was aver $5,000 for flowers to give some context. we had 7 bridesmaids bouquets, 1 brides bouquet, 7 table centerpieces, chuppah rental and florals, and placecard table flowers.
• Cocktail Hour Decor: ~50. I am so glad I did this myself since our flowers generally sucked and they wanted to charge me $35 per bud vase. I thrifted bud vases and bought some from a bride on reddit, then I got 2 old atlases from half price books, some floral wire, and then tiny black rocks from amazon. Overall this DIY cost me like $50 and it was perfect. Also in this cost are some cool votive candles I bought from amazon.
• Photography: $6,000. incredible would 100% recommend. PM me for the name. This included 10 hrs of shooting, over 800 photos, and an album
• Videography: $2,000 incredible would 100% recommend. PM me for the name. This included a full day of shooting, all raw footage, a ~5 min highlight video and a full ceremony video.
• Sabers for Saber Arch: $100 donation to the West Point Hostess Office
• Photo Booth: $350 total. $250 deposit lost due to covid. Once we moved everything outside we didn't have a good place for the photo booth or to run electricity to it. So we cancelled that and instead spent $100 on a big cutout frame we hung from the ceiling. Originally the photobooth was going to be another $400 so I'm just counting it was coming out ahead.
• Tents and dance floor rental: ~$3,500 this was an additional cost that we took on as a covid precaution and it was perfect. This includes rentals (2 tents with walls that we ended up keeping up), having tent heaters on standby (they weren't needed), and the dance floor. My mom did a great job working with the venue and the rental organization to get a great setup and flow with the tents.
• Party Entertainment: $8,500 this includes 10 musicians and live continuous music for the entire party. Also includes their travel fee and they MC'd our entire reception. They were wonderful!

​
****Appearances ****

• Gown/Alterations: $1400 for the gown, $895 for alterations - I felt incredible and I hope some of the photos I posted help any bride who is size conscious to know that even at my heaviest I felt amazing and your size shouldn't stop you from having an amazing time.
• Bridal Hair and Makeup: Hair $300, Makeup $325, bridesmaids/moms - hair $100-$150 depending on style, $125 for makeup. Both services were optional for bridesmaids and my mom decided the week of the wedding to help subsidize the cost for all bridesmaids who elected to have the services.
• Bridal Accessories: $610 Veil ($500), party earrings ($45), ceremony earrings ($0), and party headpiece ($65). All other jewelry (hat, diamond necklace, diamond bracelet, other rings) were all family pieces
• Bridesmaids Dresses: $600 - $100 per bridesmaid. Note: this wasn't necessary for groomsmen because they were all in uniforms, except my brother and my dad covered his tux
• Groom's outfit: ~80, $70 for a special uniform belt for his saber an then $10 on socks with our cat's face on them
• Wedding Rings: $1850 for both rings, his was from Costco, mine was made from diamonds I got at an estate sale by a local. jeweler. I am obsessed with my ring. there was an additional cost to polish/dip our rings and watches and jewelry but I'm not counting it in this budget because it's regular maintenance.

​
****Gifts and things people kept****

• Stationary: ~ 350 + invitations this includes: save the dates ($175), invites, thank you notes, & invitations to our virtual celebration (honestly I don't know my mom just paid directly to the invitation lady), ceremony programs ($70), menus ($30), place cards ($30),
• Wedding Party Gifts: ~$550 for 6 bridesmaids, 5 groomsmen and 2 jr groomsmen. bridesmaids got a zip up for getting ready, a makeup case and a faux fur shawl in case they were cold. Groomsmen got a yeti bottle opener and a six pack of their favorite beer. Not including the gifts we gave when we asked them to be in the wedding
• Welcome gifts and Bathroom Basket: ~$300, 25 bags we included 2 new mexico soaps, costco snacks and drinks in a canvas bag. the bathroom basket stuff was all free and leftover things we used from my cousin's bat mitzvah
• Favors: $241.51 we had the cutest little globes we filled with gummy bears! The shipping on the gummy bears was dumb but weddings make you do dumb things.
• Flip Flops : $30 for 30 pairs of flip flops. My mom bought the baskets from Marshalls, not sure how much they were but assuming under $20 each. We ended up selling the ones we didn't use.

​
****Misc****

• Wedding insurance: $636.00 this includes the liability insurance required by our venue and full cancellation insurance in case my husband was unexpectedly deployed. We didn't want to take any chances with this and losing deposits/full amounts, even though in the contracts we ensured there were military clauses throughout. This was purchased in 2019 and gave us incredible piece of mind as we opted for full full coverage.
• Misc Decor and things: $500 This includes: photo frames (we did pics of us in the tub as kids on the bathroom doors) and a photo table, placecard holders, ribbons so we could do a socially distanced hora, a Mr. and Mrs sign for our table, alcohol for our suite afterparty, chargers for the tables, kudoboard (unlimited), website domain

​
****Not counted in this budget ****
Dance Lessons: ~$600 This money would've been super well spent if I hadn't hurt myself. we still did dance a bit but it wasn't what we planned. One day we can use those skills. I actually had a great time at the dance lessons and I'd 100% do it again.
Pre Marital Counseling: ~$500 very much money well spent. We did 4 sessions with a counselor online in the weeks before the wedding. We both felt like we got some great tools and it was a fantastic outlet for conversations we needed to have. I liked that it was virtual which made it accessible and I feel like we could go back to that counselor if we ever needed it.
Ketubah: ~400, this was a Hanukkah gift in 2019
Smashing Glasses: ~200 this was a gift from my aunt who officiated the wedding.
Engagement Ring
Honeymoon
Post-Wedding Brunch - My parents paid for this, it was casual
Wedding Shoes: ~$400, I bought these incredible something bleu shoes Navy kitten heels and then glitter keds for the party. I ended up in a boot and a sneaker so womp. But luckily both pairs of these shoes aren't very "bridal" and i'm definitely planning on wearing the glitter keds to the next tech conference I go to. I don't consider these "wedding budget" things because I'll wear them other times as well.
Rehearsal dinner - MIL paid for this
I'm glad I can post this and happy to talk to any other brides/grooms who are in the midst of planning!

Planning a big destination wedding in Hawaii (Honolulu, 200ppl) -- would really want to DIY centerpieces but need advice if it is worth it to ship over there versus just hiring a florist which i would imagine would cost a lot for 20 tables. FYI -- i have a friend that lives there that i could possibly ship to in advance.
Also as far as ideas i'm thinking of bud vases with a single flower or single leaves (minimal) mixed with some geometric shapes and candles. Do you think that vision is minimal enough to bring the cost down?
Please help!!

This is a long one, so for those only interested in the numbers, scroll down to the table below. The subsequent paragraphs will be the more detailed breakdown of each of those line items on the table. I will also do my best to include the approximate cost based on our original estimate of 85 guests since I know larger weddings will eventually return and it’s good to know what the cost of that might look like.
Our original wedding was supposed to take place in June 2020, but like many other couples here, we had to postpone. Before we dive into the breakdown, here is how we handled the postponement based on our own payment schedule:

• Our venue had a simple payment schedule so we lucked out here. Our initial deposit was $1500. Half of our total was due two months before our original date (in this case April 2020). The final payment with final guest count numbers was due 1 week before our event. Prior to our April deadline, we reached out to the venue asking what our options for postponement were. They allowed us to postpone and carry over our deposit with no additional fees. There were a couple of Saturdays left in 2020 at this point. The venue placed a soft hold on these dates for us while we reached out to our vendors. We reached out to our planner and photographer first as they were our VIP vendors and we did not want to lose them. We chose a date in December that worked for them and then reached out to our remaining vendors with our new date. Fortunately all were available and willing to change dates and transfer deposits without change fees. Crisis averted for now.
• Repeated the same process for our December date lol. Our two month deadline was approaching (October 2020), only this time we started to re-evaluate the situation around September because October would have been the time we needed to send invitations and people were already asking if December was still happening. Nothing in our state guidelines regarding large gatherings changed since our lockdown in March so husband and I were feeling defeated. After reaching out to the venue again, they were more than willing to postpone again to dates in 2021 and even 2022 without additional fees so that wasn’t the issue. The thought of putting our lives on hold for another two years did not sit well with us. We were no longer considering 2021 and would only consider 2022 due to the COVID situation in our area.
• After discussing with our planner and photographer, they suggested a microwedding. They encouraged us to bump our date sooner to avoid the possibility of rain and COVID cases on the rise in November and December during the flu season. California was one of the first states to lockdown so we would not be surprised if we were the first to lock down again. Now if you’ve read this far, you know back in April our original venue only had a couple Saturdays left in 2020. When we reached out again in September, a new Saturday opened up: October 24. That my friends is how we began the quest for planning a microwedding in less than two months.

We went all in with our microwedding. We still wanted to have the wedding of our dreams regardless of our guest count. We also decided that after all we’ve been through, we currently do not want to plan a larger celebration. I realize that our spending may be considered somewhat excessive though we do live in a HCOL. I will try to point out where some of the more extreme expenses are so if you are evaluating your own budget, you can see where you don’t need to spend nearly as much as we did.

Budget Breakdown

Category	Amount (includes all taxes & fees, rounded up to the nearest US dollar)
Ceremony Venue	$2018
Dinner Venue	$3508
Partial Planner	$1500
Photographer	$3150
Videographer	$1050
String Trio	$795
Florals	$1510
Cake	$228
Makeup	$590
Hair	$410
DJ	$675
Gratuities	$710
Stationary	$137
Decor	$298
Marriage License	$61
Bride Wedding Band	$1339
Groom Wedding Band	$132
Parent & Family Gifts	$710
Hotel	$165
Bride Attire	$2666
Groom Attire	$955
Miscellaneous Expenses	$779
Grand Total	$23,386

Below is the more detailed breakdown of each line item. For privacy reasons, we will not be sharing the names of our venues or vendors in this post, but we are more than happy to share this information via DM or chat.

Ceremony Venue - $2018

This was a completely new expense for us. The beauty of a microwedding is what was once impossible suddenly becomes possible. This was our original first choice venue because it is a gorgeous waterfront property, but we never even toured it. After receiving the brochure with the minimum costs...this venue would have blown our entire budget and then some. Sometime in the last few months, California allowed wedding ceremonies to continue provided they are outdoors only. This venue created a minimony package that included the following:

• Complimentary parking
• Up to 25 Chiavari chairs
• Use of ceremony space for 2 hours
• Ceremony sound system
• Complimentary deluxe water view room for the night of ceremony
• Bottle of champagne
• Breakfast for 2 the next morning
• Late check-out

We also asked for some additional items such as a table on the gazebo, umbrellas for our musicians, and an easel for our welcome sign. We also asked for some additional set up time because the 2 hours for the ceremony space included the set up and tear down time. They were able to give us an additional 90 minutes which was great. Normally that might cost extra. The original ceremony fee for this venue on a Saturday was $5000 based on the 2019 brochure we received. We got married at our dream venue at less than half the normal cost. I have zero complaints about this venue. They delivered everything as promised on our agreement with no issues whatsoever.

Dinner Venue - $3508 (Original Cost: Approx 15K)

This was our original ceremony and reception venue. Our initial deposit was $1500 and then we had to pay an additional $1500 to meet the room minimum which in my opinion was very reasonable since this was an all inclusive venue. We even moved to their main outdoor terrace since our original space wasn’t available on the 24th and we are only allowed to use outdoor spaces. This space was even more beautiful than our original space. The remaining amount was the production fees and the gratuity for all the event staff and wait staff. I am forever grateful to the staff I worked with for close to 18 months planning, postponing, and re-planning. They never once gave me a hard time, always answered my emails promptly, and absolutely delivered. I thought they were going to murder me when I asked to reduce my guest list from 85 to 13. They didn’t. This is what was included in our package:

• Premium open bar for 3 hours
• Wine service at dinner
• Complimentary entrees for bride and groom
• 6 Hors D’Oeuvres choices
• Easel for welcome sign
• Tables (welcome table, sweetheart table, guest tables, cake table, vendor table)
• Chiavari chairs
• All linens, china, and silverware
• Mirrored round for center of each table
• Printed menus
• Duet plate (husband and I chose filet mignon and Chilean sea bass for our guests) with sides
• Champagne for toast
• Cake cutting and serving
• Meals for our vendors
• Heaters
• Fire pit and couches for a lounge area

The food was excellent! We were able to pack up all our leftover food and cake for some incredible leftovers the next day. They delivered everything as promised on our agreement with no issues whatsoever.

Partial Planner - $1500 + $150 gratuity

We originally hired our planner as a day of coordinator, but because of COVID she became more of a partial planner and truly went above and beyond. What she charged us for her services was extremely reasonable for our area and we lucked out in hiring her. She was a referral from our photographer and they had done many weddings together. Here is what her package included (taken directly from her website and was also included in our contract):

• Initial meeting
• General meeting
• Final meeting
• Curated list of vendors that fit your style and budget
• Guidance to complete all necessary paperwork
• Unlimited emails and phone calls within business hours
• Wedding rehearsal coordination
• Decor load
• Lead coordinator & assistant to manage ceremony & reception (up to 10 hours)
• Set up all personals and decor according to your approved vision
• Act as vendor point person & ensure they provide their services as contracted
• Keep activities running smoothly and according to timeline
• Direct ceremony processional and recessional
• Line up wedding party and cue for reception grand entrance
• Assist DJ in keeping clients and any necessary parties informed of any scheduled events
• Distribute vendor gratuities on your behalf
• Collect any personal items to be returned to you after the wedding an ensure they are taken to the correct loading area
• Ensure your gifts are secure and collected by the designated person
• Use of emergency kit

On the day of, our planner + an assistant were on site at the ceremony and one of her more senior assistants set up at our dinner site. I cannot express how valuable this expense was. I interviewed a couple of other planners, but this planner stood out in terms of professionalism and attention to details. The biggest thing she did for us was our timeline. She used a tool called Timeline Genius that we could view and edit. Once we finalized our timeline, she distributed it to all of our vendors. Her and all of her staff also followed up with each of our vendors, ensured they received the timeline, and made it clear exactly where they needed to be and at what time. I know certain circumstances are unavoidable and you can’t guarantee a perfect timeline no matter how much planning you do, but we actually kept a perfect schedule. No one ran late and everything went so smoothly. If you are on the fence about this expense, we highly recommend it.

Photographer - $3150 + $100 gratuity (Original Cost: $3748)

Our photographer did not have to do this for us, but she amended our contract since our wedding was much smaller and only needed one shooter. This is what our package included:

• 8 hours wedding coverage
• 450+ hand edited photos
• Online gallery
• Printing rights
• One USB flash drive with all photographs in high resolution
• Complimentary engagement session (we opted to do 1 location and 1 outfit, but she would have allowed us to do 2 locations and 2 outfits; she provided us with 140+ edited photos)
• Sneak peek of engagement session and and wedding day provided 1-3 days after
• Location scouting
• Guidance on how to plan your timeline with your wedding planner (we planned our entire ceremony time around sunset)
• Vendor recommendations

Her work is amazing. We were expecting like 3 sneak peek photos after our wedding. She stayed up all night and sent us over 40 photos around 1am. Overall, we clicked with her from the get go and that is so important when choosing a photographer. We never felt weird or awkward being in front of her camera even though husband and I despise taking photos.

Videographer - $900 + $150 for extended edit + $50 gratuity (Original Cost: $3000)

Because we downsized our wedding, we weren’t sure if we still wanted to have a videographer. We originally had a package with 10 hours of coverage, two cameras, a drone...the works. We were fully prepared to just eat the cost of our deposit on this one because we couldn’t justify spending $3000 on only a couple hours of coverage.
When we reached out to our videographer and told him our new plans, he came through for us much like our other vendors. He did not hold us to our original contract and we amended the contract to do live streaming and a file download of the recording. We had already put down $900 for our deposit and he agreed to do the recording and live streaming without any additional charges. The live stream was AMAZING. Our videographer had a microphone on my husband so our family and friends that joined us virtually were able to hear everything clearly. Plus our videographer came with two cameras plus an additional camera man which was completely unexpected. They captured the ceremony beautifully on the stream from all different angles and we now have a copy to relive the day over and over with
The $150 is for an extended polished edit that we requested that is still being worked on. Our videographer does amazing cinematic quality video so we knew we still wanted to have that after we settled all our other wedding expenses. My husband and I totally did not think we would re-watch our video but we already love the copy we do have. There were moments that happened during our ceremony such as my mom stepping on my veil and a squirrel coming to the gazebo during the moment of silence we had for our departed loved ones. You can only relive those moments through video and that really solidified the fact that we made the right decision with keeping our videographer. If you’re on the fence about this expense, there is a lot you can do here to still have one without blowing your budget. We highly recommend having one for at least the ceremony.

String Trio - $795 + $60 gratuity (Original Cost: $1100)

We almost opted to get a refund on this deposit, but we are so glad we didn’t. We had originally hired them for 30 minutes of pre-ceremony music, 30 minutes of ceremony music, and 1 hour for cocktail hour (2 hours total). When we changed plans, we cut out the cocktail hour. I know this is an expense that not everyone needs to have, but it made our ceremony absolutely beautiful. When we sent out our live stream link, we told everyone to tune in at 4pm which was 30 minutes before the ceremony. During that time our trio played everything from Beauty and the Beast to Coldplay and even Rhianna. Our guests, both present and virtual, loved the trio and we got so many compliments. They also played background music during our unity ceremony which was a nice added touch.

Florals - $1510 + $50 gratuity (Original Cost: $2247)

We went with a local old school florist who did the florals for my cousin's wedding several years ago. She doesn’t have an actual shop and works out of her home which is what makes the cost more reasonable than other florists in our area. The reason the amounts changed is because 1) We changed ceremony venues and 2) We no longer needed 10 centerpieces and some of the other things you have with a larger wedding. My floral order with this florist was hand written to give you an idea how old school she operates. Regardless, she was very easy to work with and had no problem creating a completely brand new order. When we changed ceremony venues, I asked my planner to work directly with her to coordinate what florals were needed for the new space. This was one area I didn’t have a specific vision for or care too much about besides the colors of the flowers. They copied me on all their back and forth emails and delivered florals beyond my imagination. Here is what our order included:

• Bride’s bouquet
• 1 bridesmaid bouquet
• 2 flower girl baskets with fresh petals
• 3 boutonnieres
• 2 pin on corsages
• 2 5’ gazebo side pieces (repurposed for sweetheart table at dinner)
• 4 centerpieces (repurposed for guest tables at dinner)
• 4 white box rentals to display centerpieces at ceremony
• Flowers for welcome sign
• 2 bud vases for welcome table
• Cake flowers
• Delivery to ceremony site, setup, takedown, delivery to dinner site, setup

Cake - $228 (Original Cost: Approx $600)

We had already put down a $100 deposit for our cake so we just modified our cake order. With the reduced guest count, we removed an entire tier from our cake, but still opted to purchase a two tier cake for approximately 30-40 guests so our vendors and wait staff could have some and we could still have some cake left over. My husband LOVES cake so we could not give this expense up. Our top tier was both white cake and chocolate cake with dulce de leche filling. Our bottom tier was a white cake with blueberry Bavarian filling. The cake was absolutely beautiful and delicious.

Makeup - $590 + $100 gratuity

Found a great makeup artist who did bride makeup in another wedding my sister was in. I had a 1 person bridal party, but made sure my family members who wanted makeup done for the day were taken care of. I took care of this expense. My makeup artist even went the extra mile and made touch up kits for everyone even though she normally only does it for the bride. Breakdown as follows:

• Bride makeup - $250
• Makeup for mom, sis, aunt, and cousin - $85 each

Hair - $510 + $100 gratuity

My hair person was my regular stylist who has cut and colored my hair for years. The pricing I have below is probably much more generous than going with someone I did not know. Breakdown is as follows:

• Bride hair - $150 (Chignon updo)
• Sister hair - $100 (half up/half down do with curls)
• Cousin hair - $60 (long hair curls)
• Mom and aunt hair - $50 (short hair curls)

DJ - $675 (Original Cost: $1200)

We ate the deposit here, but fortunately this was the only deposit we forfeited. Here is the breakdown of our original package:

• 4 hours of services
• Equipment: Wireless mic, 2 speakers, 1 subwoofer, 2 turntables, mixer, and MacBook
• Lighting: 1 cake pin spot, 2 dance lights, 20 wireless uplights

Our package really wasn’t bad for the price, but unfortunately we didn’t need any of it any more. We asked our DJ if we could carry over our deposit for different services later on such as a party or vow renewal. He said that we would have to sign a new contract AND pay a new deposit. No thanks. He also would not let us transfer or donate the original deposit to another couple. To be fair, he was not contractually obligated to do anything for us, but he also never wrote us a new contract for our December wedding date so who knows if he would have shown up if we proceeded with that date. My husband and I were of course upset to lose that money, but we were more upset that he had zero empathy at all about what COVID did to disrupt our plans. I completely understand that COVID eviscerated the businesses of many wedding vendors and times are tough all around, but his attitude made it easy for us to just say “thanks bye” instead of finding some way to keep him and give him our business.

Stationary - $137

This expense was for our Save the Dates only. They turned out super cute, but of course the original wedding never happened and we have a ton leftover. Will probably plaster them all over our fridge. I probably wouldn’t have any regrets about this expense if our wedding happened as scheduled, but this is probably the one thing that was a waste of money. When we made our wedding cancellation notice and sent our invitations for our virtual wedding I created all of those using the Canva app. Totally free and amazing. Breakdown is as follows:

• 50 Save the Date Magnets - $109 (purchased from Minted w/30% off discount code)
• Wrap around printer labels - $14
• Postage - $14

Decor - $298

Breakdown:

• Chiffon rental for gazebo & eucalyptus rental for welcome table - $62
• Cake stand - $42 (purchased from Amazon; cheaper than renting from bakery for $50)
• 25 Candle holders & tea lights - $59 (purchased from Amazon)
• Clear acrylic hexagons for place settings - $16 (purchased pack of 25 from Amazon)
• 18”x24” clear acrylic sheet for welcome sign - $15 (purchased from Home Depot)
• Paint and brushes to paint acrylic - $15 (purchased from Michael’s)
• Unity ceremony items - $60 (we did a tree planting so this expense includes a small tree, soil, pot, two watering cans, and two shovels)
• 4 picture frames to display engagement photos at welcome table - $29 (purchased from Marshall’s)

*NOTE: We also had a bunch of those tall glass cylinder vases that you fill with water and place floating candles in, but our planner has these in her wedding decor stockpile so we didn’t have to purchase our own which was a big win. She reuses them for every wedding.

Marriage License - $61

We did the online application through Orange County and picked up at the Honda Center in Anaheim, California.
*NOTE: Marriage certificates are an additional $15 per copy which we have not paid yet. We just mailed our license this past Monday and it takes 5-10 business days after our license is received for them to record our marriage into their records so we can order the certificates. Will likely get two copies as one needs to be mailed to the SSN office for my name change and I want a spare copy just in case.

Bride Wedding Band - $1339 & Groom Wedding Band - $132

My husband and I picked our wedding bands together and included them as part of our wedding expenses. Both were purchased at Jared.

Parent & Family Gifts - $710

Since we only had 13 guests and one of those guests was our cousin who also served as our officiant, we didn’t do favors and instead gifted them with some items they could actually use and enjoy. We definitely splurged here, but it was worth it to say thank you to those family members who helped make this wedding happen for us during a pandemic. We will also be creating photo albums and printing photos for them as part of our gifts once our photos are finished editing.

Hotel - $165

This was for a 1 night stay at the hotel that was right next door to our dinner venue. We did receive a 1 night complimentary stay at our ceremony venue which we could have used, but that would require us to drive back to the venue which we did not want to do. The coordinator from our ceremony venue mailed us a gift certificate for the 1 night complimentary stay and breakfast for two the next morning so we plan to use it on our 1 year anniversary. So excited about this.
The remaining 3 items my husband and I paid out of our own pockets. I know these expenses might still be considered shared expenses with other couples so we wanted to include them in our budget breakdown.

Bride Attire - $2666

• Dress - $1570 (gifted by my aunt; beautiful lace ballgown)
• Fabric garment bag - $28
• Alterations - $505 (I purchased a sample dress and needed to have a ton of alterations done because I’m 4’10” and plus size. Completely worth it despite the high cost.)
• Rhinestone belt for dress - $275 (I realize this is an unnecessary expense and could have just purchased this off Etsy for $30-$50)
• Undergarments - $133 (corset bra, panties, slip shorts)
• Shoes - $39 (purchased from DSW with coupon)
• Veil - $35 (purchased from Etsy)
• Earrings - $29 (purchased from Olive and Piper)
• Hair piece - $39 (purchased from Etsy)

Groom Attire - $955

All items were purchased from Men’s Warehouse
Custom 3 piece suit - $686 (completely custom measured and husband got to select all fabrics and details like the cut and color of the pieces; any additional alterations were included at no charge)

• Dress shirt - $50
• Alterations on dress shirt - $18
• Leather belt - $33
• Dress socks - $33 (pack of 3)
• Shoes - $80
• Tie - $35
• Pocket square - $20

Miscellaneous Expenses - $779

You’re probably wondering what the heck this expense is. These were mainly my own expenses for all the hair and makeup trials I did as well as the attire purchased for our engagement session. I no longer have receipts for what husband spent on his engagement session attire so that amount is not included in this breakdown.

• Dress for engagement session - $60 (purchased from StitchFix)
• Shoes for engagement session - $40 (purchased from Off Broadway Shoe Warehouse)
• Hair extensions + styling for engagement session - $70 + $20 gratuity (extensions were re-used for wedding)
• Makeup for engagement session - $120 (not the same makeup artist who did my wedding makeup; he ended up being a flake and I didn’t book him)
• Makeup trial #1 - $150 + $10 gratuity (this is my actual wedding makeup artist)
• Makeup trial #2 - $75 (we did another mini trial since the airbrush makeup didn’t last on my oily skin and we used this opportunity to also modify anything else I didn’t like about trial #1)
• Pre-ceremony haircut and color - $90 + $20 gratuity
• Mani/pedi for bride & pedi for groom - $105 + $15 gratuity

Final Thoughts

Planning for even a microwedding during COVID was so hard. Although we followed the state health orders, we were fully aware that nothing is ever 100% safe. Before we began planning for this microwedding, we had conversations with each family about their comfort level with attending such an event. Fortunately we were working with four households who are in constant communication on a regular basis. I say this to emphasize that we are all very close and transparent about following best practices during the pandemic such as distancing, mask wearing, and hand washing. Everyone in the four households works from home or is continuing school from home so it was easy for husband and I to cut our guest list there and stand firm since we trusted everyone we had present that day was doing what they needed to do to stay safe and keep each other safe.
Some other precautions we took:

• All events took place outdoors.
• Chairs at ceremony were distanced arranged by household.
• Masks were worn at all times except briefly during ceremony procession and photos. Photos were done by household.
• Husband and I COVID tested negative the week of the ceremony and quarantined after taking our test. We ensured all errands were done prior to the week of the wedding so we wouldn’t have to go out again until wedding day.
• Getting ready was done at home to avoid exposure at a hotel. Hair stylist and makeup artist wore masks and face shields and practiced the sanitization protocol they would use in their salons. We kept all windows and doors open and made sure everyone stayed in separate areas (no foot traffic).
• I had my sister carry around a bag full of sanitizer, wipes, and Lysol so we had it readily available at all times.
• Tables at dinner were distanced and arranged by household.

Lastly, do husband and I have any regrets? None whatsoever. This wedding was beyond anything we could have ever imagined. I can honestly say there is nothing we could have done differently and as crazy as this sounds, we're glad our original plans got cancelled. There were things about the original plan that we weren't happy about and this was our chance to make those right. This day was truly a reflection of the both of us.
I hope some of you find this recap helpful. If there are any questions at all, please do not hesitate to reach out. I am happy to help. Thank you so much to this community for all your support the last 18 months. Could not have done it without you.

I am not experienced with Resin casting at all, so I’m sorry if this question is dumb!
My idea for my wedding centerpieces are to turn wine glasses upside down, so the flat base of the stem is on top to be a candle holder, with the globe of the wine glass as the base.
My idea is to fill the actual glass part with something pretty like gold flakes, dried flowers, pearls or aquarium rocks in our wedding colors (maybe a combination or all different stuff, we’ll have about 3 per table). I’d like it to look like it’s floating, without using water as I’m sure that would be leaky and messy, and I was wondering, can I get that kind of look with resin? Would everything just sink to the bottom of the glass and look weird once it was flipped upside down?
Thanks in advance!

I plan to decorate my own wedding venue with the help of family and close friends (maybe a total of 5 of us).
We do not have to set up any tables, chairs, flatware, glassware, or China. Venue is responsible.
Here is my plan: U SHAPE for 80 people Table runners Centerpieces are consisting of large vases and bud vases with faux florals and greenery Tea light candles with votives Chargers A few pillar candles
Easel with seating chart Arbor with neon sign (will decorate on site).
Centerpieces will be prearranged Everything will be dropped off the night before,
How long do you think it will take us? Venue is allowing me to come in at 2pm on day of ceremony and our invitation have an arrival time of 6:30pm.

We got married this August after having to completely re-plan our wedding due to you-know-what. Here's a look at what we pulled together when we switched from a 100+ person semi-destination wedding with guests from across North America to a 15-person neighbourhood wedding on livestream in our home city. Maybe you'll find some insight or inspiration!
Here are a few photos to start :)
Only a couple weeks after we decided to pull the plug on our original plans (back in May), a local venue that's in our neighborhood announced that they'd created basically a pandemic wedding package for couples to get married safely this year. We were already familiar with the venue and jumped on this option right away. We had no existing relationships with local vendors, so this was a great choice for us and saved us a lot of additional stress. We did not want to postpone our original wedding plans due to 90% of the guest list needing to travel (regardless of where we held the wedding, our family is very spread out) and the likelihood that may be unrealistic for a long time still. We also wanted to get married before starting a family and didn't want to put that off.
The package included the venue itself, a coordinator, a photographer and a DJ all for 2 hours, a videographer with livestream setup for one hour, an officiant, venue decor and florals, and optional wedding dress rental for $2,499. The original mandated gathering size limit when we booked this was 15 people. It's since opened up to 100 people here, and we could have paid a bit extra per person to accommodate more guests, but we stuck with 15 given we have both healthcare workers and high-risk people in our families. This meant our only guests were our parents, siblings, and siblings partners. Since all the vendors included in the package were from our surrounding neighborhood (we live in a central neighborhood in a mid-size city), we also leaned into this for the rest of planning. It felt great to support local businesses who are literally our neighbours! Here's our cost breakdown:
Vendors/Food/Bev:
$2,499 - Base price of our wedding package
$1,222 - 4 additional hours at the venue (we had the space for 6 hours total and they gave us one hour free) for a reception, including tables and dinnerware, and a bartender
$52.50 - Extra floral arrangement (the original package came with 1 bridal bouquet, 2 bridesmaid bouquets, one grooms boutonniere, and 2 groomsmen boutonnieres but we negotiated and switched to just a large bridal bouquet and 2 table centerpieces in the end)
$52.50 - Additional customization for the ceremony with our officiant (she made the ceremony more personal to us by interviewing us each separately and working what she learned about us into her standard ceremony script)
$220.50 - Furniture rental of a vintage couch and coffee table to make a lounge area for the reception, included delivery and pickup. We supplemented this with 2 armchairs and a rug the venue already had.
$1,397 - Catered dinner for 15 people from a local restaurant (who happened to be in the same building as the venue). Dinner was great! They used the menu from our original wedding plans as a basis, and also made 5 of the 7 dishes vegan (we had 2 vegan guests and a pescatarian).
$155 - An 8" wedding cake and 2 vegan cupcakes from a local bakery
$350?? - Alcohol and other drinks. We had to supply our own drinks and couldn't do mixed drinks (current health guidelines). I don't really know end costs here though. We spent about $200, but then my MIL and SIL also brought more with them and we probably only went through half of what we had in the end. 5 members of our group were non-drinkers.
Attire:
$3,190 - My dress, alterations, shoes, and jewelry (all bought pre-change of plans or I probably would have reigned it in. My MIL also gifted me my hairpiece) $1,400 - My husband's jacket, custom pants, shirt, belt, shoes and pocket square (some part of this was also gifted by MIL and FIL, but not sure what)
$85 - I got my hair done at my normal salon, also in the same building as the venue. My sibling also came with me to get their hair done, but paid for themselves. Cost also doesn't include the mimosas we ordered ;)
$997 and $130 - My band and his (I got mine custom designed by the jeweler in Toronto who he had make my engagement ring, and he ordered 4 silicone rings to choose between)
Extras:
$80 - I booked a private yoga class at a local studio for the wedding morning for myself and anyone else in the family who wanted to join. We ended up with 6 people total for a 1hr class. Great way to start the day!
$230 - Misc decor items (napkins, candle holders, card box, printout mad lib advice cards, photo props, Polaroid film, photo frames)
$20 - Digital invites (Paperless Post) and digital guestbook (Kudoboard) for our livestream guests
$40 - Marriage license
Mostly free things:
- My husband is a web developer and made our wedding website
- I did my own makeup and nails using products I already owned
- My sister works in film and had nice equipment so did extra photos and video after our time was up with the vendors included in our package
- We made some decor items with help from our families, including a Mr & Mrs sign, calligraphy name cards for dinner, photo props, and I designed mad lib activity/advice cards for our livestream guests to fill out after watching our ceremony and email or mail to us (we also had different printed ones for the in-person guests)
- We plugged in a laptop and used Spotify for music for the reception
Total cost: $12,120.50 CAD
** We lost $4,725 on deposits from our original wedding plans, but we were also gifted a total of $5,000 by our parents (nice that it pretty much balanced out). For all of our previous vendors, when we canceled we asked for a 50% refund of all deposits paid to that point and they all agreed. We are fortunate that we could afford to lose the remainder and glad that the vendors we chose were still compensated for their time.
Other things I just wanna share:
- We were actively looking for little things to add to the day so our livestream guests would feel more included. With this in mind, we ended our ceremony by doing a toast that we asked all our guests to join us in. Our families had drinks with them right through the ceremony, and my husband had drinks for us waiting on the signing table by the altar. We also had the digital guestbook and advice cards mentioned above.
- We asked family members who wanted to give speeches to do them as readings during our ceremony so they'd be included in the livestream. We had 3 people speak and it was perfect and added a lot. This also extended our ceremony to about 45 minutes total. It would have been 25-30 mins without and we wanted more substance for the stream. We also said a short thank-you for the stream after our exit before they turned the stream off.
- My grandparents surprised us and had a giant bouquet delivered right to our venue from the same florist, so we had those extra flowers in the lounge area
- My siblings hosted the Shoe Game during the reception. This wasn't part of the livestream, but they had our other friends and family submit some of the questions and we filmed it to share later (my siblings also wrote a song and serenaded us, so we filmed that to share too!!!)
- Everyone came back to our apartment after the reception for gift/card opening. Then we ordered McDonald's :)
Conclusion: WE PULLED IT OFF! And I think it turned out pretty amazing, all things considered. Honestly, it was probably way more "us" than the big party we had originally planned was anyways. It was still crazy stressful though. Up until 2 weeks before we still hadn't confirmed how many people we were inviting in person and where we were hosting the reception, but we did it and now we can say we got married in the middle of a pandemic 🎉

We got married this August after having to completely re-plan our wedding due to you-know-what. Here's a look at what we pulled together when we switched from a 100+ person semi-destination wedding with guests from across North America to a 15-person neighbourhood wedding on livestream in our home city. Maybe you'll find some insight or inspiration!
Here are a few photos to start :)
Only a couple weeks after we decided to pull the plug on our original plans (back in May), a local venue that's in our neighborhood announced that they'd created basically a pandemic wedding package for couples to get married safely this year. We were already familiar with the venue and jumped on this option right away. We had no existing relationships with local vendors, so this was a great choice for us and saved us a lot of additional stress. We did not want to postpone our original wedding plans due to 90% of the guest list needing to travel (regardless of where we held the wedding, our family is very spread out) and the likelihood that may be unrealistic for a long time still. We also wanted to get married before starting a family and didn't want to put that off.
The package included the venue itself, a coordinator, a photographer and a DJ all for 2 hours, a videographer with livestream setup for one hour, an officiant, venue decor and florals, and optional wedding dress rental for $2,499. The original mandated gathering size limit when we booked this was 15 people. It's since opened up to 100 people here, and we could have paid a bit extra per person to accommodate more guests, but we stuck with 15 given we have both healthcare workers and high-risk people in our families. This meant our only guests were our parents, siblings, and siblings partners. Since all the vendors included in the package were from our surrounding neighborhood (we live in a central neighborhood in a mid-size city), we also leaned into this for the rest of planning. It felt great to support local businesses who are literally our neighbours! Here's our cost breakdown:
Vendors/Food/Bev:
$2,499 - Base price of our wedding package
$1,222 - 4 additional hours at the venue (we had the space for 6 hours total and they gave us one hour free) for a reception, including tables and dinnerware, and a bartender
$52.50 - Extra floral arrangement (the original package came with 1 bridal bouquet, 2 bridesmaid bouquets, one grooms boutonniere, and 2 groomsmen boutonnieres but we negotiated and switched to just a large bridal bouquet and 2 table centerpieces in the end)
$52.50 - Additional customization for the ceremony with our officiant (she made the ceremony more personal to us by interviewing us each separately and working what she learned about us into her standard ceremony script)
$220.50 - Furniture rental of a vintage couch and coffee table to make a lounge area for the reception, included delivery and pickup. We supplemented this with 2 armchairs and a rug the venue already had.
$1,397 - Catered dinner for 15 people from a local restaurant (who happened to be in the same building as the venue). Dinner was great! They used the menu from our original wedding plans as a basis, and also made 5 of the 7 dishes vegan (we had 2 vegan guests and a pescatarian).
$155 - An 8" wedding cake and 2 vegan cupcakes from a local bakery
$350?? - Alcohol and other drinks. We had to supply our own drinks and couldn't do mixed drinks (current health guidelines). I don't really know end costs here though. We spent about $200, but then my MIL and SIL also brought more with them and we probably only went through half of what we had in the end. 5 members of our group were non-drinkers.
Attire:
$3,190 - My dress, alterations, shoes, and jewelry (all bought pre-change of plans or I probably would have reigned it in. My MIL also gifted me my hairpiece) $1,400 - My husband's jacket, custom pants, shirt, belt, shoes and pocket square (some part of this was also gifted by MIL and FIL, but not sure what)
$85 - I got my hair done at my normal salon, also in the same building as the venue. My sibling also came with me to get their hair done, but paid for themselves. Cost also doesn't include the mimosas we ordered ;)
$997 and $130 - My band and his (I got mine custom designed by the jeweler in Toronto who he had make my engagement ring, and he ordered 4 silicone rings to choose between)
Extras:
$80 - I booked a private yoga class at a local studio for the wedding morning for myself and anyone else in the family who wanted to join. We ended up with 6 people total for a 1hr class. Great way to start the day!
$230 - Misc decor items (napkins, candle holders, card box, printout mad lib advice cards, photo props, Polaroid film, photo frames)
$20 - Digital invites (Paperless Post) and digital guestbook (Kudoboard) for our livestream guests
$40 - Marriage license
Mostly free things:
- My husband is a web developer and made our wedding website
- I did my own makeup and nails using products I already owned
- My sister works in film and had nice equipment so did extra photos and video after our time was up with the vendors included in our package
- We made some decor items with help from our families, including a Mr & Mrs sign, calligraphy name cards for dinner, photo props, and I designed mad lib activity/advice cards for our livestream guests to fill out after watching our ceremony and email or mail to us (we also had different printed ones for the in-person guests)
- We plugged in a laptop and used Spotify for music for the reception
Total cost: $12,120.50 CAD
** We lost $4,725 on deposits from our original wedding plans, but we were also gifted a total of $5,000 by our parents (nice that it pretty much balanced out). For all of our previous vendors, when we canceled we asked for a 50% refund of all deposits paid to that point and they all agreed. We are fortunate that we could afford to lose the remainder and glad that the vendors we chose were still compensated for their time.
Other things I just wanna share:
- We were actively looking for little things to add to the day so our livestream guests would feel more included. With this in mind, we ended our ceremony by doing a toast that we asked all our guests to join us in. Our families had drinks with them right through the ceremony, and my husband had drinks for us waiting on the signing table by the altar. We also had the digital guestbook and advice cards mentioned above.
- We asked family members who wanted to give speeches to do them as readings during our ceremony so they'd be included in the livestream. We had 3 people speak and it was perfect and added a lot. This also extended our ceremony to about 45 minutes total. It would have been 25-30 mins without and we wanted more substance for the stream. We also said a short thank-you for the stream after our exit before they turned the stream off.
- My grandparents surprised us and had a giant bouquet delivered right to our venue from the same florist, so we had those extra flowers in the lounge area
- My siblings hosted the Shoe Game during the reception. This wasn't part of the livestream, but they had our other friends and family submit some of the questions and we filmed it to share later (my siblings also wrote a song and serenaded us, so we filmed that to share too!!!)
- Everyone came back to our apartment after the reception for gift/card opening. Then we ordered McDonald's :)
Conclusion: WE PULLED IT OFF! And I think it turned out pretty amazing, all things considered. Honestly, it was probably way more "us" than the big party we had originally planned was anyways. It was still crazy stressful though. Up until 2 weeks before we still hadn't confirmed how many people we were inviting in person and where we were hosting the reception, but we did it and now we can say we got married in the middle of a pandemic 🎉

Hi guys!
I am currently the MOH for my cousins wedding and we are trying to brainstorm some affordable centerpieces. It's an industrial theme and we plan on putting 3 different size jars with candles and some green leaves wrapped around them. The main colors are blush and navy, and we have about 18 tables to work with. The cost of a florist was too much so we may lean towards fake flowers.
Please recommend anything! Thank you.

Hello! I hope other brides find this helpful!
But first... PICTURES!
Location: San Gabriel, Pasadena & Westminister, CA
Guests: 250
Budgeted: $35,000
Spent: $32,959
Our wedding was a Chinese/Vietnamese-American Catholic wedding. My husband and I paid for the wedding out of our own pockets. It took us about 2 years to plan and save for the wedding. There were a lot of DIYs to cut costs and help from family and friends setting everything up.
Now onto the details!
Florals: $294

• Bouquets: $129
  • We bought fresh wholesale flowers from the Flower District in DTLA. My husband and I woke up early in the morning to get the best picks and spent a couple of hours putting it together the day before the wedding. This made for great bonding time. In total we made four bridesmaid/groomswomen bouquets, a small one for the flower girl, the groom's boutineer, the bridal bouquet and flowers for the wedding cake. Our flowers were actually more expensive because it was so close to Valentine's Day. The ribbons and pins were from Michael's and Ann linens. Always use coupons!
• Florals for the church alter: $130
  • We ordered two huge flower baskets for the church alter from the Flower District. We picked it up the day before the wedding since they didn't deliver.
• Boutineers (family): $36
  • Bought ~50 ribbon flower pins from AliExpress for family, aunts and uncles. It's an Asian thing.

Ceremony (Catholic Church): $700

• Church Donation: $500
  • This is pretty much the rental fee.
• Coordinator for rehearsal: $50
• Pianist: $150
  • He was actually the church's pianist so he knew exactly what to do.

Tea Ceremony: $479

• Vu Quy signage + Floral Arch (rental): $75
  • This is a sign for wedding day. "Vu Quy" is the term used to signify leaving the house for the husband, and this sign is usually used at the bride's side of the wedding.
• Incense Set (rental): $15
• Double Happiness Paper Cups: $11
  • We didn't want to share the same tea cup among 20+ relatives
• Roasted Pig: $280
• Wine: $58
  • We bought wholesale from a winery
• Wedding Trays (rental): $40
  • To put the gifts for the bride's family. The gifts included wine, fruit, teas and herbs (provided by groom's parents).

Reception: $18,253

• Food/Venue: $13,984
  • Asian banquets charge by the table and each table seats 10 guests--we had 25 round tables + Sweetheart table. The venue included the wedding cake, hors d'oeuvre during cocktail hour, a 9-course family style meal per table and soda. We also paid for special meals for guests that had dietary restrictions and our vendors (MC + Photo/Video team). We had the place from 3PM for set up till 11PM. The venue cleaned everything themselves.
  • Going with an asian banquet made everything so much easier. It's affordable and it includes everything like tables, chair, table clothes, glassware, plates, lighting and etc.
• Open Bar: $1,856
  • Early on in the wedding planning, my husband and I knew we wanted an open bar cuz a majority of our guests love to drink. One of the deciding factors of our reception banquet was that they had an open bar option in the package. This meant one less vendor for me to worry about. Other banquet halls that we checked out were BYOB/hire your own bartenders. We paid for four hours of the premium menu. They were also very VERY generous with the alcohol so everyone had a blast. They also included virgin drink menu for kids. After doing the math, if each guest had at least one drink, it'll be $7 per head. So it was worth it in my opinion. And at the end of the night, everyone had enough liquid courage to get onto the dance floor.
• Emcee + Tip: $550
  • We hired an MC that spoke Cantonese/Mandarin. She was the MC of a previous wedding we attended. She had a great presence and knew how to keep the crowd going with games.
• DJ: $619
  • The DJ was actually the manageson of the owner so we got a discount when we hired him.
• Photobooth: $500
  • We rented a photobooth for four hours. The package included unlimited use, custom artwork/templates, onsite attendant, CD/cloud download of all photos, props and delivery/setup/tear down.
• Sweetheart Table Decor: $173
  • This included flower row from Aliexpress, candles from Ikea, various sizes of vases from Dollar Tree, Ikea and Burlington Coat Factory.
• Table Center Piece: $291
  • These were completely DIY and we made 25 of these. I bought candle holders and glass bowl from Dollar Tree, fake flowers from AliExpress and glued them all together. As much as I love fresh flowers, I couldn't bring myself to spend thousands on them for them to wilt in a couple of days. It's been a couple of months and I still see my centerpieces at my guests homes!
• Wedding favors: $205
  • I ordered 250 wedding favor boxes from AliExpress and put two ferror rochers into each. The ferror rochers were on sale at Costco. The downside was we had to fold all 250 boxes ourselves. This gave us something to do during those Netflix nights.
• Card box: $21
  • Since this was an Asian wedding, all our guests brought card gifts (e.g. checks, cash, giftcards).
• Sparklers: $28
  • I highly suggest doing an exit with sparklers. It made for awesome pictures/video.
• Cake topper: $35
  • My husband and I are into anime instead of ordering a typical take topper from Etsy, we opted to order a couple of bootleg Nendoroids off of AliExpress to customize figures that look like us.

Photography + Videography: $9,161

• Photography + Videography: $9,100
  • When my husband and I started planning our wedding, we agreed that if we were to splurge on anything, it'll be the photo/video. They were such a dream to work with. Everything went so smoothly because of them. They've worked with Asian weddings before so they knew the ins and out of our day/tradition. They'll tell me if I had a stray hair, if my husband had to move his hand an inch, or to fix my wedding dress. I have absolutely no regrets.
  • We paid for 14 hour coverage. It was a realllyyyy long day. I think there were about 8 of them with us the entire day.
  • We also paid extra to have them compile a 3-4min video of the wedding day. This was a great idea because instead of going through 14 hours of footage from multiple cameras, we already have a video to look back on to relive this special day.
• City Hall Permit: $61
  • Some places require a permit for wedding photos. Double check yours!!

Attire: $2,228

• Wedding Dress: $1,098
  • I ultimately decided to rent my dress instead of purchasing it. The rental included the wedding dress (obviously), alterations (two sessions), veil, earrings, hair accessories and dry cleaning. My wedding dress was Perla by Kitty Chen (MSRP ~$2.3k).
• Bride's Shoes + Inserts: $97
  • I bought two pairs of Jewel Badgley Mischka that were both on sale/clearance ($65 + $26) at Nordstroms and Macys. One for the wedding day, and another shorter, more comfortable one for the evening. I highly recommend buying inserts ($6). I was standing, walking and dancing all day (14+hrs).
• Evening Dress + Alterations: $275
  • Something to change into since the wedding dress was so heavy. Plus I wanted to wear something super sparkly and glittery and gold. This was the best time to do it.
• Garter Belt: $3
  • I just bought a cheap one from AliExpress since it was gonna be thrown around in the evening anyway.
• Bridesmaid/Groomswomen dress: $208
  • I bought them the infinity dress so they can be creative and customize it to however they like. In the end, they all ended up looking the same anyway lol
• Grooms Suit + Alterations: $179
  • From the Fashion District in DTLA. This includes shirt, jacket, pants, tie and vest.
• Groom's Shoes: $85
• Get Ready Pajamas: $58
  • I bought 6 satin pairs from AliExpress. Funny story, the pants tore on the butt area while taking jumping pictures. It just couldn't contain this booty. I recommend buying something stretchy.
• Traditional Vietnamese Outfit- Bride (rental): $75
  • Includes the traditional hat, alterations, and cleaning fee
• Traditional Vietnamese Outfit- Groom (rental): $35
  • My husband actually rented the groomsmen style. He didn't like the groom's style or else it would have been $75.
• Flower Girl Dress: $47
• Flower Girl Basket + Ring Pillow/box: $29
• Ring Bearer Suit: $22

Makeup + Hair: $1,235

• Makeup + Hair Trial: $130
• Makeup + Hair + Tip: $865
  • There were two MUAs. This includes bride + five other girls. We started getting ready around 4:30AM till around 9:30AM.
• Nails: $155
  • I paid for my mom and I's nails. It was our first time getting mani professionally done so it was such a treat.
• Hair Extensions: $85
  • I have pretty thin hair so I needed the extra volume.

Misc: $609

• Wedding Invitation + Postage: $256
• Marriage Certificate: $91
  • for California!
• Sheraton - Junior Suite: $262
  • I actually used my Chase points for this. The bridesmaids and I slept overnight in the room. We also rented this suite to get our hair and makeup done.

​
Thank you if you've made it this far! Feel free to ask questions, if any :)

Hi lovely Weddit world!
We would've gotten married on Sunday, May 24,2020 but due to COVID, we pushed it to September, and again due to COVID, we cancelled and are happy with the decision! We already celebrated and went to the court to get married. However, I still want to share what we would've spent for our wedding. I'm relieved that we didn't have the wedding because potentially putting our friends and family in danger was causing a lot of stress.
Please excuse if the below is in past tense as I had started this draft in Feb. :)
Estimated Actual Spend: ~$26,400
Decided Budget: $20K
Total Guests: 100 adults
We would've been almost at budget if our first venue hadn't suddenly closed. The previous place was BYOB. Thank goodness we found out May 2019 and were able to get our deposit back from our CC company. We booked the new venue a few weeks later but this new place had a per drink charge. That was fine as we did some rough estimates on how many drinks each guest would have and budgeted it that way. All in all, having our first venue close was a blessing in disguise as the new venue was closer to our parents + had complimentary valet parking!
Venue:
They charge on a per person basis. The cost of the venue included bridal suite, grooms lounge, ceremony-cocktail-reception space, all servers + bartenders, on-site manager, complimentary valet parking, chairs + tables, linens & tableware, whole day use of the venue, service charge + gratuity. We decided to opt for the 2-entree buffet. Entrees included salmon & short rib. This came with a salad, side vegetables, pasta dish. We decided to forego the included champagne toast for an extra app during cocktail hour. We had 4 apps total during cocktail hour.
Since we decided to have our wedding on a Sunday, we were able to negotiate a special they were currently having for 2019 which was $90 per person vs. $110 per person. That saved us a chunk of money!

• Venue Price: $90 per person
• Tax (9.5%):
• Vendor Meal: $25 for 7 people
• Drink Total: estimated $5,000
• Total: $15,610

DJ:
We found our DJ on Thumbtack and we got along with him really well during our video interview. He was just starting out on his full-time DJ gig so we were able to snag him at a good place since we booked him 1.5 years in advance LOL. Now, he's DJ'ed at at least 50 events. We had him for 6 hours.

• Ceremony, Cocktail, Reception: $660

Month-of Coordinator + Florals:
I found this DOC through our old venue's instagram. She's awesome! Because we decided to do florals with her as well, she was able to discount the DOC fee to $1200. She's super responsive and on top of her sh*t.
For florals, I was pretty simple. I only wanted my bridal bouquet to have flowers and my 3 BM bouquets to be greenery. We would have had greenery centerpieces with hurricane candles for centerpieces and we repurposed these greenery wreaths for the ceremony area. Our floral package included 1 bridal bouquet, 1 tossing bouquet, 3 BM bouquets, 10 boutonnières, 10 centerpieces, sweetheart greenery, delivery/set-up fee.

• DOC Price: $1200
• Floral Price: $1090
• Total: $2290

Photography + Videography:
We opted to book both services with the same company and it brought down costs. We weren't super picky about who we went with but just looked at each person's portfolio and decided that we liked them + the customer service was amazing/super responsive. Our package included 7 hours of p+v, 2 shooters each.

• P+V Price: $3750

Stationary:
For STD & Invites, we sent electronic save the dates and electronic invites to the majority of our guests. We only printed about 20 for the older folks who liked to have the physical invites. I spent maybe 2 hours designing them so that cost some time but I was having fun? I'm SO glad I did this as we didn't lose any money for doing this.

• Printing Cost = $16

Attire:
This is the part I was most anxious about as I felt uncomfortable spending so much money on a dress for 1 day but I ended up getting my freaking dress at a thrift store when they were having a sale! I got my veil online and I got my shoes from Macys. My husband got a suit from Suit Supply but he could wear it to other events/work. He wore shoes he already had. I'm just bummed that I'll prob never wear my dress + my husband will never wear his suit LOL.

• Dress: $50
• Alterations: $120 (only need to take in bust + add bustle)
• Shoes: $50
• Veil: $30
• Suit: $900 (including alterations)
• Bowtie: $20
• Total: $1170

Makeup/Hair
I went with a super popular studio that all my friends had used. My makeup artist was pretty good. I had previously had a trial in Asia so I knew what I wanted and what I didn't like. I was happy with my overall look. I paid for 1 service for each BM + 2 moms.

• Trial: $140
• Day-of H+M: $349
• 3 BMs + 2 moms (1 service each @ $85): $425
• Total: $914

Wedding Party Gifts:
We did individualized gifts for each of our dear friends who were part our of wedding party. One of our friends was also our officiant so we got her a gift as a thank you.

• 3 BM Gifts: $300
• 3 GM Gifts: $300
• 1 Officiant Gift: $50
• Total: $650

Rehearsal Lunch:
We had decided to host a rehearsal lunch since we had to have our rehearsal at 11AM the day before due to an event that night. My parents would've graciously gifted this to us. This was a Chinese banquet style meal for 24 people.

• Total: $1000

Misc:
We spent some money here and there for random stuff. My friend let us borrow 20 hurricane vases for centerpiece decor so I was able to save $2-3 per candle. We also bought frames for our welcome sign. We did end up borrowing a lot of stuff which was great!

• Random Stuff/ Decorations: $50

Things to keep in mind:

• I didn't include Tip amounts but I would've estimated around $300 for tips total.

I hope this is helpful and it IS possible to plan a good wedding in Los Angeles for under the average!

https://www.reddit.com/weddingplanning/comments/g5r1gn/were_considering_having_a_renfestddfantasy_themed/
So. Per my previous post, my and my fiance were thinking of having a RenFest/DnD/Fantasy themed wedding. We're still kinda thinking down that road, but were trying to simplify it more, make it more casual so people dont feel like they have to buy full costumes. I've even found a dress! I absolutely love it!
https://www.uniondresses.com/civil-scoop-neck-3-4-sleeve-tea-length-ivory-lace-ruffle-wedding-dress-bow-belt.html
He seems to like the idea of me wearing a dress like this, and he can wear a nice white puffy shirt, some bard pants (I dont know what they're actually called, but I know what I mean) and boots. People can just show up in garden party clothes, I guess?
So. The more cohesive ideas now is this:
Colors: Purples, Greens, Yellows, Oranges, and Light Greys
Flowers: Sunflowers, White Daisies, Calla Lilies, Daffodils, Tulips, Purple and White Orchids, White and Orange and Yellow Rose's, and White Lilies
Music: A Downloaded Playlist with a Speaker System
Guest Max: 50-75 Preferred but 100-150 max
Season: Fall or Spring
Centerpieces:
Fall: White and Orange Roses, Sunflowers, Lavender, Candles and/or Lanterns, Ivy, Maple Leaves, Pumpkins
Spring: White Calla Lilies, Sunflowers, Daisies, Tulips, Daffodils, Ivy, Twinkles/Fairy Lights
Venue: Church (if nice and fiance wants that) for the ceremony, a Park or Garden Venue for for the reception or Park or Garden Venue for both
Reception Menu (WIP):
-Turkey Legs & Sausages
-Split Pea Soup
-Roasted Veggies and Potatoes
-Artisan Rolls
-Grilled Corn
-Fruit Salad (Ambrosia?)
-Fairy Cakes
-Cheese & Fruit Platter
Drinks:
-Iced Tea
-Lemonade
-Rum
-Mead
-Whiskey
-Screwdrivers
-Margaritas (Strawberry and Watermelon)
-Sodas (Coke, Sprite, etc)
The Cake: (This a kind of unique one)
We're thinking a small hat cake for the top tier, decorated with Sunflower and Tulip designs.
Then, three or four tiers of assorted flavor cupcakes (chocolate, vanilla, strawberry, and possibly lemon and carrot cake) also decorated with sunflowers and tulips.
Then, bottom tier is a decorated cookie cake, probably chocolate chip cookie, with a couple thin layers, and some type of design on it. (He thought itd be awesome to combine the rather southern idea of a grooms cake, with the cupcake/cake idea and create our own thing)
Clothing Wise: We've Both Got a Mixed Bag of Male and Female Friends and Rather Than Just Having All The Girls on My Side and the Guys on His Side, We're Doing "Bridesmaids and Bridesmates" and "Groomsmen and Groomsmaids"
-Bridesmaids: Purple Fairy-Like dresses, flats to match, hair in buns, and flowers pins for their hair, possibly fairy wings
-Bridesmates: White Shirt, Bard Pants, Boots, Purple Vest, Flower or Ivy Crown
-Groomsmen: White Shirt, Bard Pants, Boots, Green Vest, Ivy Crown
-Groomsmaids: Green and Fairy-Like, Flats to Match, Hair in Buns, Ivy Pins or Crown?
-Flower Girl: Purple and Fairy-Like, Curled Hair Worn Down, and a Flower Crown, and Flats to Match
-Ringbearer: White Shirt, Green Vest, Bard Pants, Boots, and Ivy Crown
What We're Watching/Using for Inspiration:
-A Knights Tale
-Ever After
-A Midsummer Nights Dream
-Rodgers & Hammerstein's Cinderella (90's)
-The Magical Legend of Leprechauns
-The 10th Kingdom
-Merlin
-The Voyage of the Unicorn
-Legend
-Snow Queen (2002)
-Alice in Wonderland (1999)
-Snow White: The Fairest of Them All
-Ella Enchanted
Stray Ideas:
-Say "I Do's" beneath a big tree or a simple arch
-Handfasting? Me and Him Fence Eachother (al a, Klingon Weddings or Red Sonja?)? Me and Him Get Coronated?
-Provide outdoor accessories for guests (in baskets?), like hats, sunscreen, fans, umbrellas, blankets, sunglasses, bug spray, etc.
-Hang Fairy Lights everywhere
-Wooden Tables with White Tablecloths and Separate Kids Table?
-Wedding Favor Ideas: S'mores Kits, Bubbles, Fans, Cocktail Kits, Noisemakers, Cookies/Macaroons
-Flower Crowns?
-Swords? Axes? How to use them?
-Goblets?
-Lanterns?
-Juggler Entertainer?
-Fortune Teller?
-Magician?
-Dancers?
-Kids Activities: Kites, Hula Hoops, Hopscotch, Coloring Supplies, Jump Ropes, Chalk, Activity Booklets, Bubbles, Pinata?, Streamers, Fairy Wings/Wands?, Toy Swords?
-Use Tents?
-Lawn Games: Giant Jenga, Ring Toss, Corn Hole Toss, etc?
Could maybe still use a little help creating something cohesive here, but we're thinking, like, aiming for a low key fairy-like wedding, without going full tilt into the fantasy realm, ya know? Maybe could use some help making some of the stray ideas a bit more cohesive, or just any advice on how to proceed with these ideas would be awesome!
I'm super excited guys! I'm so nervous, but I'm so excited! I dont even know how I'm gonna write my vows! I have so much to say to him, and I cant even begin to describe how much I love him, much less in a cohesive statement that I'm supposed to say in a minute or two. I'm so happy, you guys!

I know it’s been hard to talk or think about weddings lately but I think other couples may find our postponement and small ceremony helpful as they make or change plans. I first want to acknowledge that we are really, really lucky to have our immediately family nearby, parents with the space to host, and the financial ability to afford a second event.
 
My fiance and I got engaged in the beginning of January 2019 after 7 years together. He proposed with a ring I chose from this Esty shop. It’s moissanite and beautiful and cost him $1,200 (We did not include the cost of this ring in our wedding budget. It’s also the only wedding item he paid for.)
Original Plan:
Where: Harriet Island Pavilion, Saint Paul, Minnesota. (Ceremony at a local Catholic Church)
When: April 25th, 2020
Who: 273 of our nearest and dearest. (Venue cap at 275)
Budget: $23,000 ($10,000 from parents, the rest from my savings). Obviously, we didn’t have the event so that number isn’t exact.
 
By March 15th it was becoming painfully clear we weren’t going to have the event as we had planned it. I started making contingency plans and reaching out to vendors to see what we could do. Everyone was really understanding and we were able to rebook all our vendors for May 1st, 2021 for minimal additional fees.
We knew we wanted to get married now but, for us, having our parents and siblings present was the most important thing. We felt weird about holding our ceremony in the middle of the lockdown but we had to have it before my fiance started his medical residency in early June. We waited until restrictions were being lifted in our state and picked May 23rd. We talked to our priest, and he talked to the archbishop, and got the tentative go ahead to hold the ceremony outside a Catholic Church (which is normally a big no-no). All our guests promised to be extra socially distant the two weeks leading up to and after our ceremony in order to decrease the risk of transmission.
 
New Plan: Photo’s first!
Where: My fiance's parents house. Ceremony outside, dinner on the screened in porch.
When: May 23rd, 2020
Who: 13 immediate family members (+ our photographer and 2 family friend musicians who played from 20 feet away during the ceremony)
Actual Cost: $2,600 (paid for by us) Here’s that broken down:
Food: $295 We got take and bake meals from our favorite restaurant plus salad, bread, and apps. And cheesecake!
Drinks: $100 We had gin gimlets, champagne, and wine. We have plenty of leftovers!
Photographer: $300 (because restriction has been loosened, our photographer was able to attend. She was fantastic and I’d recommend her to any twin cities bride)
Officiant: $35 Our priest backed out last minute because the archbishop never gave him the final approval (he was too busy trying to reopen churches early despite the governor’s orders and the whole, you know, pandemic thing) My fiance’s sister stepped in and did a wonderful job. We worked together to write a ceremony script, vows, and chose new readings in record time. We're still hoping to have our marriage convalidated and hold a vow renewal next year in the church but we'll see.
Attire: $800. My fiance's suit was $275 and he’ll wear it again next year. My dress was $150, secondhand BHLND from craiglist, with $275 worth of alterations. (I had it taken in, the back opened, I hand-beaded straps/belt that was added, and hem shortened). I may or may not wear this dress again next year.
Rings: $766. These were from a local jewelry. Mine was custom to fit my engagement ring. Obviously, we will use these rings for wedding 2.0
Music: $200. We had a violinist and a flautist so they could play Concerning Hobbits to walk into.
Decor: $100. Almost everything was DIY. I had made/purchased everything for our original plan so I had more than enough items to go over the top with our decor. This cost only reflects what we used. Here’s what we used that day: handmade copper arch, hand-dyed cheesecloth table runners and ceiling draping, led candles, fairy lights, goblet vases.
Flowers: $20. All the flowers are handmade from crepe paper (I did not factor what my time is worth into this estimate!) I had made literally thousands of flowers and greenery over the last year. Luckily, they keep forever so I can use my bouquet and centerpieces for wedding 2.0. I might do a full post/breakdown/instruction on this if people are interested (and as crazy as I was to take this on).
Besides the flowers, here are some DIY details I’m especially proud of:

• I made my earring and wore them over the pearl studs my mom wore for her wedding. I also made my hairpiece but forgot to take pictures of it.
  
• The vases cost $2 a piece. Shout out to this post that showed me how to make them from dollar tree supplies.
  

 
Overall, I wouldn’t have had our wedding any other way. I’m looking forward to the vow renewal and party next year but for now I’m content to be married to the person I chose. All in all, we spent about $900 that we wouldn’t have spent if we had gone ahead with our original plan. We’ll probably spend at least another $500 on various unplanned expenses (new save the dates, invites, maybe a jumpsuit for me) for our wedding 2.0.
 
I didn’t mean to write a novel but I was trying to be thorough! Let me know if you have questions or comments!

I (25 F) got married in March and wanted to share some advice, tips, and things that worked out really well for our rustic wedding and that fit our 10k total budget!

1 All Inclusive Venue: We booked an all inclusive venue for our ceremony and reception. This included the ceremony set up with wood chairs and a wood arch and our reception set up. Finding an all inclusive venue is amazing because you don’t get nickeled and dimed on chairs, linens, silverware, and glassware. It was all included with a day of coordinator and they even set it all up for us. We figured it was worth it to spend a good amount of our budget on the venue because of everything it included! In one fee we took care of the ceremony, dinner, and the reception! When we first started looking at venues we thought it would be cheaper to book a ranch style venue but the costs to bring in all of the rentals and food was crazy.

2 Sit Down Dinner Option: For some reason, our venue was cheaper for the sit down dinner option versus the buffet option. They said it was because they had to prepare more food for the buffet. We went with the sit down option and even though it was more planning for guest’s meal choice and seating arrangements, it saved us money and was easier for our guests!

3 Hobby Lobby Deals: Hobby Lobby became my go to place for wedding supplies. They have a wedding section that would be discounted 50% every few weeks. If items were not on sale that week, I could purchase one item at a time with a 40% off coupon that can be found online. They have so many things from signs, decor, guest books, unity candle ceremony candle holders, etc. Most of the wood signs I bought for our welcome table & guest book were only a few dollars and cheaper to buy than to make!

4 Amazon: Amazon was another great place to get wedding supplies. We had a rustic theme, so I purchased our table numbers and holders, greenery, and a special tablecloth for our sweetheart table off of Amazon. Compare pricing with other stores because sometimes sellers jack up the prices, but there are very good deals and an array of wedding supplies!

5 Wedding Favors: This is my favorite tip to share with you all!!! We got married on Pi Day (3-14) and decided to have mini pies as our wedding favors. They were not only rustic looking but also were a play on Pi Day. We purchased mini pies from Walmart and rewrapped them a day before the wedding in clear plastic treat bags, with rustic twine, and a thank you tag that I purchased from Hobby Lobby! The pies are 2 for $1, so 50 cents each!! This made our wedding favors so cute and so inexpensive! Everyone loved them!

6 Simple Details: To be honest, I stressed out about so many little things for my wedding. From the centerpieces to the welcome table, I wanted everything to be perfect. No one even remembers what was or wasn’t on their table. As long as you have good food, drinks, and music everyone is happy!!! Our guests were so ecstatic to celebrate our love and our union. It didn’t matter what kind of candles and flowers were on the table. Of course you want it to be beautiful, but my suggestion after looking back is to keep it simple!!! We went with white hydrangeas with eucalyptus greenery in mason jars for our flowers. They turned out so beautiful in their simplicity!

7 Wedding Traditions: My husband and I decided early on that we wanted our wedding to feel like “us” and we didn’t want to be pressured into decisions based on Traditions. We decided not to do the garter & bouquet toss. We also entered to our first dance song and only danced to it for a short time. No one even cared!!! My advice is to use the Traditions that feel right for you and don’t worry about the others! This is your day!

8 Schedule: I had our day of timeline to the minute and on the day of, my schedule completely went out the window! My advice is to have a general idea and schedule of events, but understand that the timeframe will change!

9 Dress & Change of Clothes: My dress had a petticoat underneath and I cannot express how hot I was from it! The skirt of my dress did not breathe and I had sweat dripping down my legs. I became so overheated that I had to go to the restroom to pick my gown up and air out my legs with cool towels. My biggest regret is not having a change of clothes for exiting the wedding. My feet hurt like hell from my heels and even though I brought a pair of ballet flats, I never had time to change shoes. I was so hot that I could only dance for a few songs and then we planned our grand exit. I was so bummed about this and didn’t even realize how hot my dress would be when I tried it on at the store and for fittings. If you have a large dress, I would suggest bringing a change of clothes for the end of the evening. I was so uncomfortable during the car ride to our hotel and was overheated. I asked my husband to take off my dress as soon as we walked into our hotel room and took a shower to cool down. I never wanted to be one of those girls who had a dress change for the reception, but I completely understand why now. My advice is to spend some time in your dress and see how comfortable you are in it after some time. This is something I didn’t do and looking back I definitely would have changed out of it in order to dance and enjoy myself!

I know this list is all over the place, but I hope this helps you with planning your special day!

Medieval: the perfect setting for this theme will be the historic church or castle. Using calligraphy is a good way to differentiate this time period. With gothic style and rich colors like dark blue and purple, the decorative effect is better.
Victorian - The ideal ceremony for this theme is a Victorian mansion or garden with a beautiful gazebo, and nothing is more suitable for the reception than in the great ballroom. Lace can be used not only to decorate the bride's clothes, but also to decorate tables and other decorative items. White, light white and light pink color, don't forget to add tea in the menu.
1920: The bride can look very creative on the wedding day with a unique headdress or a long pearl. Bridesmaids can choose shorter dresses, similar to the iconic bezel images of that era, and the best man can
move them back with a fedora. Your choice of music at the reception can be jazz-centric, combining a unique cabaret style.
Destination
Cities - Whether you are planning a wedding in a different city or you just want your wedding to feel like it is somewhere else, you can include specific elements that make a city your wedding theme.
Make the most of colors, historical relics, cultural relics, flowers for the city, and of course, fashion.
Interest
Rock and Roll - The most important aspect of this wedding theme is the music that keeps your guests rocking all night long. Don't dress like a classic bride or groom, but go for something more rebellious. Think of your favorite rock song and use the elements of the song to decorate your ideas.
Fairy tales: Most of the girls who dream of happiness need a wedding for the princess. Get ideas for your rituals and receptions from your favorite fairy tales.
You can go out of your way to use the carriage and the Great Ballroom, or use subtle touches to create the theme.
Movie: The big screen is a source of inspiration for many couples. If you want to capture the feel of a movie for your wedding, the possibilities are endless. From wedding costumes and music to food and decorations, you can do a lot of different things to make the movie vibrant. Some of the great themes in the movies include "Alice in Wonderland", "Grease" and "Drift." What is your favorite thing?
Culture: Asia has many different cultures, each with its own unique wedding customs and traditions. If the bride or groom is of a particular Asian race, it is important to incorporate the traditional costumes of this culture into weddings and food.
Other cultural elements that can be used include traditional patterns, artwork, colors, writing, etc.
Four Seasons
Spring: The weather turns warmer, the flowers bloom, there is no better time to celebrate the wedding. Garden weddings are perfect for this season, and the use of flowers and butterflies is especially common at spring weddings.
The color used is usually very light, as is the fabric, combined with foods that contain a lot of fresh fruit, vegetables and herbs.
Summer: Everyone loves summer, which is why it is one of the most popular seasons for weddings. The outdoor ritual is perfect for this time of year and there are many different places to choose from. The use of bright and vivid colors is the ideal option for this season. Provide refreshing food and drinks to make your wedding party easy and comfortable.
Fall: This season reminds us of rich, deciduous colors like red, orange, gold, and brown. If your weather is not too cold, the outdoor wedding is still very suitable. The menu should include meals made with the usual food of the season, such as pumpkins and apples. The central decoration with autumn leaves and candles is also ideal for receptions.
Winter: The Winter Wonderland wedding theme is popular with many couples. White is the main color, it is easy to make the decoration look delicate and elegant, especially the use of silver or gold decoration.
Think about how to incorporate snowflakes into your site decor and wedding.
Wedding Color Scheme: Once you have decided on a theme, it is easier to choose the color combinations that you will use during your wedding. Select the shadow color that represents your theme.
Wedding Venues: Wedding themes also play an important role in the selection of ceremonies and reception venues. Having a theme can help narrow down the selection of wedding ceremonies.
Wedding Attire - Wedding themes can affect the bride, groom, wedding party costumes, and sometimes even guests. Whether you decide to wear traditional or unconventional, formal or casual clothing depends on how it suits your theme.
Wedding Decorations: Looking for a centerpiece and table?
Let the wedding theme inspire the décor of your entire reception.
Wedding Menu: The theme of the wedding can greatly affect the food you provide to your guests during the reception. Your menu may reflect a specific time period, culture, location, or season.
Wedding Benefits: Give your guests something special to take home as a little thank you. Gifts related to your wedding theme will remind you of the good times you have had.
Wedding Flower Arrangement: With so many flowers to choose from, having a wedding theme makes it easier to determine the color scheme of flower arrangements and narrow it down to a specific style.
Wedding Cake: The wedding cake itself has become a work of art. Your wedding cake can be one of the best delegates to your theme.
Discuss your ideas with the experts and let them play their magic.
Wedding Invitations: By incorporating the theme of the wedding into your invitation, everyone knows what to expect on your important day.
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We made the official moves to cancel our wedding this week - notifying wedding party, then guests, then vendors. We don't plan to have the same big party, and are instead hoping to get married as soon as City Hall opens back up for us to get a license, and doing a smaller Catholic ceremony/reception once this is all over. As a final farewell to the would-be wedding, I wanted to still post a budget recap as we had taken a lot of effort to budget for everything needed. Some of this stuff is obviously an estimation as it would have depended on our final numbers, but this was our general estimates based on 220 guests. Wish I could have written this with photos to share, but I still hope it offers some clarity for couples planning a big wedding in a HCOL area. I included comments on my negotiations as well as how cancellation worked with these vendors.
Financial Summary
Total Cost of the Wedding: ~$45K
Our financial contribution: $40K
My mom's financial contribution: $5K wedding gift, plus floral costs/labor and other expenses picked up here and there
*Additional spending not included in budget (rings, outfits, alterations): $5760
**Total value of discounts and negotiations: ~$4200
***Total value of wedding if you included discounts and additional spending: ~$54,960
Breakdown
Venue & Insurance - $6500
- Seventh/Place venue ($6500) Venue was going to be the Seventh/Place in DTLA. It's a renovated warehouse space that fit our large guest count, had a lovely outdoor patio, had a 16 hour rental period and included tables and chairs as part of the rental price. Pricing also came with uplights lining the walls,string lights across the ceiling, and 2 security guards. It was a really simple but romantic space, and felt very us. They also had a full open vendor policy (except for florals and valet) so we could really shop around and find solutions to fit our budget. Price was originally $7150, negotiated a $650 discount for paying upfront. They have a Force Majeure clause and I requested 100% of our payment back on Friday. Still waiting to hear back from them but this is one I intend to fight tooth and nail for.
Food and Beverage - $24,894.03
- Hungry Bear Catering (Would have been $18007.28, we paid a $7946 deposit) Food was my #1 priority and going to be the biggest expense. Most traditional caterers were priced pretty similarly with more 'meh' food, and if I was going to spend thousands on catering, I wanted it to be memorable. This price includes 3 passed apps (tofu baos, crab cakes, beef tataki) and a family style meal of bread/buttefurikake chex mix on the table, 1 salad course, 2 mains (filet mignon and miso salmon), and 2 sides (fish glazed brussel sprouts and miso carbonara). Anyone with dietary restrictions got their own meal, as did kids. They also provided cake cutting, 3 welcome drinks, and coffee/tea service in this price. Price does not include equipment which we had to rent separately. Their base price is usually $80/person before tax and service charges, but we were able to negotiate down to $66.50/person without removing any services. Per the contract we would have gotten 50% of the deposit back for cancellation, but we decided to have them keep the cost and are working with them to donate meals to a food bank instead
- MTB Event Rentals ($2300) Estimate for bring in glassware, serving ware for the tables, and a full kitchen setup. MTB had the most reasonable prices and were great to work with. We were able to cancel and get 100% of our deposit back.
- Linens/Table Runners (~$600) An amazing fellow Wedditor offered to make cheesecloth table runners for me at cost. It came out to around $320 for 20 17 ft. white cheesecloth runners (around $1/ft). I wanted a clean tablescape with white linens, white runner and greenery down the table. These added a soft ethereal look to the table while staying minimalistic. I was also going to buy linens and napkins online.
- Compostable Plates ($450) Estimate for compostable dinner plate, salad plate, dessert plate, and family style platters for the table.
- Smoking Gun Bartending ($676.75) Found these guys on Thumbtack and so glad I did! This was for 2 bartenders and 1 bar back ($20/hr per staff). Price also included ice for the whole night, 2 mobile bar setups and coffee service and equipment. Even though we only paid for coffee for 150 people, they were going to bring enough cups for 220 to use for coffee and tea.
- Cups/Mixers/Alcohol ($2300) We were going to do wine, beer, and limited liquor (whiskey, gin, vodka) with a couple signature cocktails and mixers for basic cocktails. Cups I priced out through Amazon and were a combination of plastic 12 oz cups for beer, small 9 oz cups for cocktails and water, plus 12 oz stemless wine glasses.
- Whole Foods Cake ($300) I did the traditional cake tasting and it was so fun to try cool, unique flavors, but after getting a $665 quote, we decided that desserts were low priority for us. We were planning to do 3 round cakes on a tiered cake stand, plus some extra half sheets to serve.
- Si Paletas cart ($400) I am MOST sad about this!! I was excited to use the money we saved on cake to have boozy popsicles served during cocktail hour from a paletas cart. I think it would have been a really fun addition to a summer wedding.
- Welcome Happy Hour ($500) We were going to host a welcome happy hour from 4-7 PM the Friday before the wedding. We provided some food and drinks to start things off, but made it clear on our website that additional drinks & food can be purchased with happy hour pricing.
Photography/Videography (9.5%) - $3800
- River Medlock Photography ($3000) Photography was our #2 priority and budgeted $3-4K for photography. However, with the tea ceremony in the morning, we needed 10 hours of photography and found the going rate for 10 hours was $4500-$6K. Luckily, I found Jana + Jamie of River Medlock Photography through A Practical Wedding and I loved their work. For SoCal weddings, they offer a flat $3k package for full day coverage (12 hours max). Still deciding what we want to do about this vendor. Ideally, I'd love for them to still photograph our future celebration, but if not, we will forfeit the $600 deposit.
- Last Light Pictures videography ($800) We found Last Light Pictures through a recommendation on Reddit and they offered a raw footage package for $600, plus guest interviews for $200. We didn't have to pay a deposit for LLP so we just cancelled our contract with them.
Stationary/Paper Goods (1.13%) - $452
- Paperless Post Save the Dates ($50) Did digital STDs but I accidentally picked a layout that cost coins. Didn't realize it until I was finished designing and inputting addresses, and was too lazy to go back and redesign a free one. The $50 was my lazy tax.
- Invitation Design ($99) Bought a custom watercolor logo for our wedding suite ($50). We incorporated the heart shaped rock by Land's End in SF (the location where we got engaged), a California poppy (husband's CA roots), a lotus (my Vietnamese heritage) and our cat. I also had her do a rendering of our wedding venue ($49). We used the logo on all our paper goods and designed on Canva.
- Invitations ( ~$195) We printed invites in Vietnam and got 180 envelopes with our return address on them, 2-sided invite cards, a 1-sided details card, and a 1-sided invite card for our Catholic ceremony (smaller, separate ceremony). I paid ~$60 for the deposit and then my mom ended up paying the rest when she picked it up. Cost is an estimate because of conversion rates. Price also includes 200 paper boxes which we put chocolates in and laid at each place setting for favors. It was unnecessary, but the boxes cost $6 total and my mom really wanted it, so we let her handle it.
- Postage ($0) I took stamps from work and expensed some more so we paid $0 for postage. Unethical? Maybe. But the company that just acquired us closed our SF office and require us to work from home 100% without reimbursing us for any internet or phone costs, so I consider this part of my benefits package.
- Website ($72) made the mistake of using Squarespace before trying any of the free websites. I just loved how much control you had over the website and could not go back, so we ended up just purchasing a year hosting and custom domain. My husband works for a university so we got the education discount.
- Signage ($120) Planned to print a welcome sign and seating chart on Vistaprint for about $20 each. My friend had given me a nice frame from her wedding, which we used for the welcome sign, and we were going to buy another poster frame for $10 for the seating chart. Michael's at easels for sale for $12 each.
- Other paper goods ($50) Was going to design the programs (bilingual wedding, programs were necessary), menu and bar signs on Canva. Staples sells cardstock for $50.
Entertainment (3.5%) - $1387.96
- Bouquet Sound DJ ($1095) By the time we got to picking a DJ, we were pretty decision fatigued. Bouquet Sound played at my friend's wedding and we enjoyed it, so I reached out to them.The owner offered us a referral rate, which we were able to negotiate down a little further. This was for ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception music. Original package was $1495, he offered us a referral rate of $1295, and I negotiated a little further by expressing that we wanted to go with them but my budget was $1k. He brought it down to $1095 if we were able to pay the deposit same day. We will forfeit the deposit but still need to contact them about it.
- Photobooth ($450) Was planning to DIY a photo station but ended up finding DJ Michael Han based on Reddit referrals. We booked his photobooth for 4 hours, 6 X 8 strips and digital gallery for $350. Super reasonable prices, especially compared to the $700+ rates I was getting from other vendors. Planned to spend another $100 to get life size cardboard cut outs of me, my husband, and our cat Ben Kenobi for props.Paid a $100 deposit which he gave back.
- Giant Jenga & various games ($40) Bought giant Jenga on Black Friday as a lawn game for some additional entertainment. So, I guess I now have Giant Jenga.
Day of Coordinator (4.5%) $1800
My coordinator was Tiffany at Modest Magnolia. She is very experienced with weddings and you could tell from the first conversation with her. Though she was only a DOC, I was in contact with her throughout my entire planning process and she reached out to me in January for my June wedding with a wedding planning worksheet so she can get started on working on my timeline.. Her going rate is $2k, but I was able to negotiate a $200 discount for offering to pay upfront. I'm trying to see if I can transfer my rate to someone who might be looking for a coordinator. Otherwise we'll forfeit the deposit.
Flowers &Decor (0.58%) $230 I'm solidly in the camp of "no one cares about decor" so we kept it very minimal. i think the brick walls and greenery of the venue were gorgeous on their own, so we let the place mostly speak for itself and just bought a few things to fill up the tables.
Flowers My mom was going to pay for and make all our flowers so luckily we didn't have to deal with a floral deposit!
Centerpieces ($0) My cousin got married in Vietnam and she had 12 wood lantern displays with fake flowers and candles in them lining her ceremony aisle. She offered them to me after the wedding and we were going to repurpose into centerpieces. My best friend is getting married in April so she's going to use these instead, so I'm glad they are still getting put to use!
Candles, vases, table numbers (~$230) Bought gold vases and mercury votives off my friend for $80, plus a ton more led candles and votives on FB marketplace. Also planned to buy wood block table numbers on Etsy to tie in with the wood centerpieces, so this is budgeted in here too.
Hair and Makeup - $1212
- Studio MM&B Includes hair and makeup for bride ($480) and trial ($250). I also paid for my mom's hair and makeup ($190) plus 50% of any services that my bridal party wanted (another $292). Studio MM&B was great, super professional and talented artists, but they definitely have the prices to reflect that. I paid for this deposit maybe 3 weeks before the world blew up, so really regretting this one. It's non-refundable though, so what can you do.
Wedding Party Gifts/Attire - $1200 In lieu of presents, we paid for our wedding party's attire. It was definitely more money than if we just bought them small presents, but 3 out of my 5 bridesmaids are in grad school/medical residencies and I knew that the most thoughtful present would be to help with the cost of being in the wedding. My bridesmaids wore midi length sage green dresses from Fame&Partners and City Chic, and their dresses ranged from $100-$139. For groomsmen, we were going to pay for the suit rental (jacket&pant) from Generation Tux at $139 each.
Transportation costs - $1592.50
\ - Riz Transportation shuttle service ($580) Price is for 5 hours, inclusive of tax and gratuity. I booked the shuttle to transport the groom's family + wedding party from LA to my parent's house for our tea ceremony (a 20-30 minute drive). We could have let people figure this out themselves, but I wanted to keep the group on time and keep people from needing to rent a car just to get to the tea ceremony.Just emailed him today about our deposit, so still waiting to hear back.
- Valet parking ($1012.50) The rate was $135/hr for 25 cars. The vendor requires that you book them for an hour before your event starts up to 30 minutes after the end time (7.5 hours). This was a painful expense, but parking in the Arts District can be hit or miss and I was already throwing my traditional Vietnamese family for a loop with my warehouse wedding. So we paid for parking, which was organized and invoiced by our venue. Luckily this was going to be handled through the venue so we didn't have to put any money down.
Tips - $1000 What I had budgeted for tips
Additional Spending Not included in Budget - $5760 Basically our attire and wedding rings, which we paid for through our regular paychecks and not the savings account. I didn't really consider these part of the wedding budget because they are going to last us past the wedding day, but wanted to include the breakdown for transparency.
- Groom's suit ($500) My husband got a custom 2-piece suit made in Vietnam at a tailor we've used before. He could definitely get a suit in Asia for far less but this shop stocks high quality fabrics and does all of their tailoring in-house so it's still a bargain for the price point.
- Wedding Dress ($2500) I bought the A La Robe Juliette in blush at The Dress Theory in Seattle. It's a simple slip dress and it was just a perfect fit for my style. The soft pink color and deep low back felt rebellious and fashion forward, but also it was minimal and comfy AF. I'm currently debating if I want to keep this or just resell it to get some money back from this wedding. I do still love it and it has rewearability potential though, so I'm back and forth.
- Wedding Headpiece ($690) I bought a Jennifer Behr headpiece off Poshmark impulsively. This was a ridiculous purchase but I loved it. Hoping to be able to resell or give to a friend to use for any upcoming weddings.
- Alterations ($410) This was the estimate for alterations. My dress is currently sitting with them and my first fitting was supposed to be end of April. Unsure now if they'll be open then, but I didn't have to put any money down so this was money not yet spent.
- Wedding Rings ($1660) My husband got a 6.5 mm gold comfort fit band for $820. I got two wedding bands off an online retailer,Noemie, for $840 total. My engagement ring was passed down from my MIL and we didn't make any changes to it, so it was $0.
Final Thoughts:
Overall, we probably stand to forfeit ~$10k in lost deposits, though we *could* have gotten more back from our caterer. I know this is a ton of money (as much as some people's whole weddings) and it was definitely not an easy decision to walk away from. However, the big wedding just no longer felt like something we wanted after going through this tough year (Covid on top of other personal stuff), and I'm big on not letting the "Cost Sunk Fallacy" drive your decisions. By walking away from $10k, we will have saved $30K. It actually worked out well because I'm now at risk for getting furloughed, so the extra savings is an extreme blessing during these shaky times!
And a final plug - if anyone is interested in any of these vendors, I may be able to discuss transferring my contract and payments to you. Would love for them to still fill their calendars and get some business!

Hey y’all! Like most other recappers, these were super helpful when planning my wedding and I’d like to pay it forward! This is going to be kind of long because, well, I don’t have any plans for the rest of the weekend…or the year…Feel free to ask me any questions or advice!
Engagement length: 14 months
Location: Houston, TX
General Date: Saturday evening in March
Guest Count: 160 invited (50% out of state), 130 RSVP’ed Yes, 120 Attended (no kids except 1 ring bearer)
Wedding Party: 8 bridesmaids, 8 groomsmen, 2 ushers, 1 ring bearer
Total Budget / Actual Spend: $52k / $53k
US AS AN (INTERRACIAL) COUPLE:
We both work for the same company and met about 4 years ago in North Dakota. We are an interracial couple (I’m Chinese American, he’s….well, Midwestern) and that came with its own challenges during the wedding planning - we wanted a mostly American wedding but also wanted to include some Chinese cultural touches! My parents are not that traditional, so we didn’t have a tea ceremony, but here are some of the Chinese elements we included:

• One of our ceremony readings was from my 90-year-old grandfather, who lives in Nanjing and wasn’t able to attend. He wrote us a letter with marriage advice (he’s still married to my grandma today!) and we translated it into English. One of my ushers is bilingual and he first read it in Chinese, and then in English. Some people told me they cried at the Chinese part and they didn’t even understand it! So sweet and funny.
• I changed into a red qipao (traditional Chinese dress) during the cocktail hour. I changed back into my white dress for the reception…but then I couldn’t breathe during dinner (oops) so went right back into the qipao!
• We gave away cute little red boxes filled with Ferrero Rochers and Hershey kisses as a wedding favor. The red boxes are laser-cut with the Chinese symbol for luck and a cartoon couple - pretty cute!

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BUDGET BREAKDOWN
Venue ($8,500)
We picked a romantic, Italian-style event venue that’s pretty well-known in Houston. I had wanted to go more towards the rustic/farmhouse type wedding (more DIY opportunities!) but my husband wanted something different from the other weddings he’s been to. This price includes the ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception spaces; valet parking; tables, chairs and basic linens; security guard; tax and service fee.
Food and Drink ($15,500)
Our venue has an in-house chef for appetizers and dinner, so we only had to shop around for desserts.

• Cocktail Hour Appetizers ($1,260 / $10 per guest) We had two kinds of passed appetizers during the cocktail hour: bacon wrapped scallops and beef crostini. Both were delicious!
• Dinner ($10,300 / $85 per guest + $280 / $35 per vendor) For the soup course, we had a crab and roasted corn chowder - got SO many rave reviews! For the entree, we served ribeye with a side of roasted vegetables and fusilli pasta with pesto. We decided to go with sit-down because it was the same price as buffet style (although they threw in a couple of perks if you chose buffet). Warning if you go with steak: you can’t specify how it gets cooked for every guest! I personally want my steak mooing (which they allowed for bride and groom), but we had to go with medium for the guests to get a balance between the rare-steak eaters and the BRICK eaters.
• Desserts ($725) We went with a traditional 3-tier cake (marbled cake with buttercream frosting) for $400, or $4 per slice. This was a steal - we got a discount for going with a preferred vendor at our venue! For the groom’s cake we went with mini pies - apple, strawberry rhubarb, buttercream and key lime. They were a HUGE hit and I loved supporting a small business - a one-woman operation who did a marvelous job with both the pies and the display! She gave us a free tasting of 6 different flavors, too! Each mini pie was $3.
• Drinks ($30 per guest) We did an open bar with champagne toast included - I was annoyed at first because so much of my family and friends don’t drink, but I’m glad I didn’t have to worry about running out of alcohol or running up an even higher tab!

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Florals and Decor ($3,850)
I was not very picky about any part of the florals because I trust the professionals and know nothing about flowers myself. They turned out great - we chose a few images we liked on Pinterest and our florist made it happen!

• Bouquets ($185 for bride; $45 per bridesmaid; $8-15 for corsages and boutonnieres) We re-used the bridesmaid bouquets on the cake table and my bouquet at the sweetheart table.
• Ceremony florals ($400 for arch)
• Reception florals ($55 - $150 per centerpiece) We went with tall centerpieces (that were also used in the ceremony), short centerpieces and floating candle centerpieces to give some variety.
• Reception decor (DIY) ($100) We DIY’ed the seating chart (designed on Canva for free and put in one of my mom’s large picture frames) and signs (designed on Canva, printed on cardstock and put in floating frames found at HomeGoods). We also made some signs listing the pie flavors. Finally, we found these awesome light-up marquee letters on Amazon with our initials and put them on the sweetheart table!
• Cocktail hour decor (DIY) ($250) We bought 36 floating candles from Yummi Candles online. Highly recommend - they came in a safely packed box and are already sorted to 3 different heights! I then got some faux lamb’s ear wreaths on sale from Hobby Lobby to surround the candles. We used the remaining candles in the reception. Best of all, we also used them as centerpieces for the rehearsal dinner the night before.

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Music ($3,500 including $400 stage rental)
We are big live music fans, so having a live band was important to us. However, I will say if you’re on a budget, this is one thing you really don’t need. Most of the weddings I’ve been to have had DJs and they were still a blast. But….THE BAND WAS AMAZING. They also did a jazz trio for the cocktail hour and set up the sound system/microphones for our ceremony at an additional cost.
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Photo/Video ($4,350 total / $2,000 photo / $2,000 video / $350 photo booth)
LOVED our photographer. We had used a friend for engagement photos, so they let me replace that part of the package with bridal portraits instead! Highly recommend doing portraits ahead of time if you’re on a tight schedule the day of the wedding; got a lot more pictures of my dress and the venue beforehand so I was less stressed the day of. I also timed my hair and makeup trial for the same day as the portraits.
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Gifts ($2,000)

• Bridesmaid proposals ($100) I did little boxes with a personalized puzzle, chocolates and a card. In retrospect, it was cute and appreciated but THIS WAS TOTALLY UNNECESSARY. Pinterest strikes again…
• Bridesmaid gifts ($35 each) I bought earrings from Olive + Piper for all my bridesmaids (optional to wear for the wedding). I kept the gifts small because I paid for their dresses, hair and makeup.
• Groomsmen/usher gifts ($100 each) All the groomsmen and ushers received a pair of black Jordans to wear for the wedding and keep. At first I was aghast at the groomsmen wearing sneakers, but…they actually looked pretty awesome - and they look like formal black shoes from far away!
• Officiant/Ring Bearer gifts ($150 total)

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Stationery ($1,250)

• Save-the-Dates (Minted / $250 inc. stamps)
• Invitations (Minted / $450 inc. stamps)
• Thank You notes (Amazon / $50 inc. stamps)
• Programs (Canva + Vistaprint / $150)
• Menus (Canva + Vistaprint / $150)
• Guestbook (Etsy / $150) I got a wooden alternative guestbook to hang on our wall. It’s a map of the US and highlights the two states we came from, with a dotted line that connects them. We didn’t intend it, but most people signed near wherever they’re from on the map (which made for some awkward clumps, but we liked it!)
• Vow books (Etsy / $50) I splurged and got personalized fabric vow books from Etsy. There are enough pages that we’ll be writing a new page for every anniversary :)

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Attire ($6,000)

• Wedding dress ($2,000 dress / $400 alterations) My dress was from Essence of Australia. I had bought it thinking I could make it strapless, but the whole open-back-means-no-strapless concept went right over my head. My seamstress was amazing and able to thin the straps out to look more delicate, but in the end I wish I had bought a dress that I would’ve loved without any significant adjustments!
• Groom’s tux ($250) Groom and groomsmen all rented from The Black Tux, which was perfect since they’re all over the country. They had them shipped to our apartment and we handed everything out during the rehearsal. Husband loved his so much that when they offered a discount to just purchase the thing instead of returning it, he took it!
• Bridesmaid dresses ($60 per dress) Maid of honor got her dress from BHLDN. We got super lucky and bought the floor sample because it was the only one left - ended up being $70 instead of $200 and looked good as new after dry-cleaning. I got everyone else’s dresses from Lulu’s with a 20% discount. TIP: If you buy from Lulu’s and want them all the same color, make sure you email customer service and buy the dresses all at once. Their dyes can change slightly between batches. I got lucky, but be careful!
• Hair and makeup ($300 bride / $150 bridesmaids) It was so fun to get dolled up together on the day of! I got Chick Fil A catering for us and brought some champagne.
• Shoes ($50) I’m the same height as my husband, so got the sparkly Kate Spade Keds. THEY RUN LARGE and I have skinny feet so I had to buy thick socks to make them fit.
• Wedding bands ($1,500 total) I went with local jeweler and husband went with Costco.
• Other jewelry ($30) I bought earrings on sale from Macy’s for $13 and hair pins from Amazon for $15. Did not think these were things worth splurging on!

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Day-of Coordinator ($1,000)
Rehearsal Dinner ($5,000)
We had about 60 people attend because we invited the wedding party and their dates, plus a lot of out-of-town guests. We held it at a brewery, so we served BBQ for dinner and opened up the event to all other guests after dinner to enjoy beers outside!
After-party ($1,000)
Because our venue had such restrictive timing, we decided to move the party to a casual bar down the street. We covered the tab here as well.
Tips ($600 total)
This doesn't include the required gratuity for both the wedding and rehearsal dinner venues. I gave my MOH's boyfriend a bunch of envelopes with each vendor's name so he could hand them out during the wedding. Delegate!
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WHAT WENT WELL

• The event was very well-coordinated and nothing really went wrong during. The staff were all amazing and made everything flow seamlessly! For those of your struggling with deciding on a Day-Of Coordinator, DO IT. I didn't have to do a thing but enjoy the wedding. So worth it.
• Also...we came really close to budget and I'm proud of sticking to it. We had to sacrifice a few things along the way because some costs came up that we hadn't anticipated. But overall, it added up as expected!

WHAT DIDN’T GO WELL / SHOULD HAVE DONE DIFFERENTLY

• I was stressed throughout the planning process because my venue was so restrictive on time. They only gave us 2 hours before the ceremony in the dressing room, and then 4.5 hours for the ceremony, cocktail hour and reception combined. Every additional hour for the wedding would have been $2,500. I would have preferred a venue that gives you all day to set up, relax, get ready, etc. instead.
• It also rained during the last 10 minutes of the cocktail hour, so everyone went to the reception early. That was minor but still a bummer, since that area was my favorite part of the venue!
• Finally, looking through photos there were a lot of shots that I forgot to include on my shot list. We didn't get pictures of the invitations, vow books, etc. I was probably too "chill" and just let the photographers do their thing.
• Make sure you talk to your venue about leftovers. We had a lot of mini pies leftover and they somehow didn't make it into our packed car at the end of the night...so sad!

WHAT I DIDN’T NEED, IN HINDSIGHT

• Hotel blocks....I was extra and reserved FOUR hotel blocks. About 5 rooms total were booked between the 4. Yep, everyone went with Airbnb or staying with friends. I used Kleinfeld hotel blocks (they were helpful but my friend said their hotel rates aren't as good as direct communication with the hotel) and made sure to do courtesy blocks, so there wasn't much impact anyway.
• Menus and programs - everyone says this and it's true. But it was pretty cheap since I designed my own!
• Favors. Only did these because my mom insisted. SO many people didn't take them! I ate chocolate for weeks though...that was a plus :)
• Bridesmaid proposals - cute but don't stress about it! My bridesmaids would have been happy with a phone call or brunch, I think!
• Ceremony arch...it was a nice touch but nobody would've cared if it wasn't there.
• We didn't have a formal sendoff in order to save time, and we had an afterparty planned anyway. I didn't miss it at all!